You run through the rain with me.
Past the stream as it overflows.
Our clothes are drenched with rain,
but my love for you just grows.
We drift in and out of cloudbursts,
laughing all the while.
No matter what the weather
I just love to see you smile.
The air is thick around us,
as you pull me to you close.
Your fingers find my dripping hair
as I kiss your perfect nose.
My clothes are
plastered to my frame.
But it doesn't seem to matter
since you're whispering my name.
You look into my eyes
and I can tell you are afraid.
I kiss away your fears.
I'll keep each promise made.
Clinging to eachother,
two fools here in the rain.
As long as I'm with you,
my heart can feel no pain.
Author notes
For Wyatt
Favorite song = "Long Trip Alone" Dierks Bentley
A contest entry
- Anything Goes by Whyitt U.
4200 points, ended April 24, 2007, 22 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - My AP Family Contest by KhaosFury.
450 points, ended May 7, 2007, 19 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make Me Smile. by I will stand by you.
300 points, ended May 9, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - GIVE ME YOUR BEST LOVE POEM by Whispering Wind.
700 points, ended June 11, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love Stories :) by forbidden-colour.
300 points, ended October 27, 2007, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PREWRITTEN POEMS!!!!! by kavi22.
450 points, ended August 5, 2008, 138 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rain. Rain. Rain. by rosie4491.
450 points, ended August 7, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Gold rhymed poems only. by ecrivain01.
550 points, ended February 11, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 24 of 24
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Awwww! such a sweet love poem! and my favorite love atmosphere.
The air is thick around us,
as you pull me to you close.
Your fingers find my dripping hair
as I kiss your perfect nose.
My favorite stanza and at the same time my least favorite. The imagery is absolutely stunning! but the second line seems quite rough. forced even.. to rhyme with nose. perhaps something like "you pull me - oh so close" or "as you pull me ever close"
the 4th stanza is a little awkward as well. but it's a wonderful pen either way! a little polishing and it's as good as new! *my suggestions are just that though - suggestions* Best of luck!
Keep it up =] -
i heart you angie. *says in that witch's voice from wizzard of ozz>* and your little poems too! =)
hehe
*APPLAUSE!!!!!*
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haha.. well thanks doll.
i heart you too
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Hmm.. I like the ideas in some parts of this write; full of vibe and voice, but other parts seemed a little cliche, and some lines had great flow while others flow was distorted. Nonetheless; this poems sends off great emotion. Good write. Thanks for the entry.
Ryan -
Just love the wonderful feeling this sends to me...Love in the rain playing lovers games...Sweet very sweet
thank you so much for entering and sharing with me
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cloudbursts...
Fun in the rain? Well written and sweet!
Good luck in the contest!
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Thanks so much.. it means a lot!
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oops! wrong emoticon! i meant for it to be a smile >>
keep it up -
"As long as I'm with you,
my heart can feel no pain."
Love the poem :@ -
I loved it. As long as I'm with you, my heart can feel no pain. good line
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AWWWW!!!
A lovely love poem.You did really well with this.I could feel the wet clothes steaming in the sunshine, Ros -
Very lovely and tender write. I enjoyed it.
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Very beautiful! its extremly lovely and the imagery it amazing!! thanks for entering my contest best of luck!!!
~Cosmic
P.S.
Can you tell me which person you want to be in my family please? Its hard cuz I cant veiw your profile beacuse I'm only a sliver member x] Thank you! -
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Sister Please!
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i dont think it is cliche....i think it is romantically comforting!
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I am so loving this...another day in paradise made perfect because of you. I can see it all so vividly, and feel your dripping hair, and your loving stare...as I whisper in your ear, Angie...Angie...when will those clouds all disappear? Angie..Angie...where will it leads us from here? Angie...Angie...maybe you could walk with me a while, maybe I could rest beneath your smile...As I hug you tight and hold you near you wipe away every tear...and kiss away all of my fears. You are amazing and this made me cry. Thank you very much for this wonderful write!!!
Wyatt xoxoxo
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Beautiful......amazing it seems with true love nothting else matters
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gooD
it is a great one I love it , the flow of word is great
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Ah! Young love is so grand! So all encompassing! I really envy that feeling! I especially liked the last stanza, it finished it off so nicely! Great read!
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This is beautiful. Full of wonderful imagery and heartfelt emotion. Best of luck in the contest and keep up the great work. Bravo
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Thanks so much!
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great
Awww, this is a sweet poem -
A little cliche, but it's cute overall.
Nice job.
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Thanks.. Yeah.. I'm a little on the sappy side..lol.
Angie
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