Even with my hearts slow rythm I can its withered calling
To the dark room where I sit all day
Where the tears and shadows are as one
In my thought I've now become
A subtext to destiny
A blurb of life
A faceless kiss
Trouble
And I can’t see how im going to break through
I strive to breathe again but i confess
This isnt working I've fled my dream
The walls are caving in but that’s all it seems
I've got colours bright and colours dull
Each and everyone now has begun
To fade to me and all I am
Im never gonna be the only man
We all have issues theres no time for me
My existance glossed over ignored invisible
So minute and insignificant like a flea
You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far
You see this rain keeps pouring
Now im wet through
Even in this rain I still see you
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
It’s a small way to offer you my heart
I'm a bankrupt citizen on lovers’ path
So dont call to me with your bird song
Cuz the happy days well they've been and gone
So let’s summerise as summer dawns
Let’s take off these jeans and apply some shorts
We’ll take the lonely walk to the golden sands
Where once again we’ll hold our hands
So take at look at us and dont even try
To try seperate us cuz its do or die
You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far
You see this rain keeps pouring
Now im wet through
Even in this rain I still see you
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
We'll take a ride in my old blue chevy
And we'll have a picnic down at the levy
Cuz it’s me and you and all our dreams
We’ve laughter and fun bursting from our seams
When I look at you, I coulda never imagined
How when I first saw your smile you evoke such passion
And the first night you told me that you'd left mike
Well that windswept evening i turn out the light
And I fell asleep with you in my arms
I whispered in your ear you'd come to no harm
You stood at that door all drenched sure
That you loved me when I opened that door
And when we fell to the bed that night
Holding you well it felt just right
You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far
You see this rain keeps pouring
Now im wet through
Even in this rain I still see you
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
And when we woke up early to the gorgeous sun
I kissed your fragile cuz my life'd begun
So I took your hand beneath the old oak tree
Where we first sat, when we were five and three
And as I held your delicate lady fingers
And I stutter with my words and the tention lingered
You raised my head and you said tell me now
It doesnt matter where we are or how
I looked at her right in the eyes and the words that followed
Well it filled the gap that leaves the loveless hollowed
You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far
You see this rain keeps pouring
Now im wet through
Even in this rain I still see you
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
I said hey rosey would you do the honour
Of walking down the isle lord you could not falt her
She looked at me and with her warm embrace
Well she answered me with tears on her face
She said of course i'll take your hand in marriage
And we'll travel to the church in a golden carrage
I said for you my dear, a-well the world can stand
Cuz when we're waiting with the vicar I'll be holding your hand
You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far
You see this rain keeps pouring
Now im wet through
Even in this rain I still see you
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
And we can be together forever and your infinite charms
Will see me smiling all day while the oceans calm
I can’t wait for the day when you'll be mine
But while i'm walking this highway i'll never find
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
We’ll take the lonely walk to the golden sands
Where once again we’ll hold our hands
So take at look at us and dont even try
To try seperate us cuz its do or die
I held your hands and fell in love that night
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
I held your hands and fell in love that night
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I held your hands and fell in love that night
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far
You see this rain keeps pouring
Now im wet through
Even in this rain I still see you
You’re the star in my heaven that smiles on me
You’re the sun in my life and the wind in the trees
I call you mercy and you hold me tight
I held your hands and fell in love that night
Author notes
I wrote this with many of the great blue grass and country songs i like in mind. This is written in my mind to be performed by a solo artist with an acoustic guitar or with acoustic guitar backing. I dont tend to write songs often but this strangely has worked so im proud of it.
There was no initial thought and development. This is one of my many, made up on the spot poems, where I have enjoyed the flow and continued writing, until the flow has died or the idea has outlived its potential.
Thanks for reading.
If the only crtique is to fix up spelling or some of the capitalisation dont bother commenting I only want comments on the actual style of the poem and other such matters. I can fix the minor issues soon enough.
I hope you enjoy it take care and peace and love to all im knackered cuz its 01:11 on monday morning and i have to catch a bus in 6 hours LOL!!!! night!! xx
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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two thumbs way way up
i love it my friend you really are talented with words i can honestly see this working and not just on the country format lol like all great lyrics u can aply this to almost every other genre of music it would work well as a pop tune i surpose but tbh i think that would be disrespect full but it would definetly work as a country or even an old school rock song i dont know like posion and every rose has a thorn it would just work hmmm i really enjoy it keep writing


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Long, but good!
Man! That took some readin, did it while flicking between The OC and some thing about transvestites (haha! silly tansvestites).
But yea, some amazing bits and some bits i didn't like so much. When I first saw:
"You’ve got no idea
Dont even try
Just drink another beer
Cuz its do or die
And now you see me with my old guitar
Down the 101 I havent got too far"
I thought, hey that makes a good chorus, and what do you know! So do you by the looks of it! Haha.
I was trying to sing bits and make rhythms out of the stazas, and I kept coming up with different ones. This could be made into a lot of different tracks. The first part (before the 1st chorusy thing) feels very different to the rest. That may have been how I read it, I'm not sure, but it evolved into something a lot more lyrical possibly less original so. I like the start better in other words, lol.
One of my favourite bits was:
"It’s a small way to offer you my heart
I'm a bankrupt citizen on lovers’ path
So dont call to me with your bird song
Cuz the happy days well they've been and gone"
I liked it lots, very original part.
Good job on this long piece Tom. It was really good to read, despite loosing a little flow. =D
Daz

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thanks darren its in its third version at prestn i aiming by the 5th for it to be done
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