We all imbibed
from the same fountains.
The ones that we use to satisfy each thirst.
But some are thirstier
than others,
sometimes out of habit, pride,
or just the impatience
from waiting in line.
So we argue over the size of our cup,
how pretty it is or expensive.
Eventually,
the heat from the boasting and obession,
clashes with the heat of the day,
we lose the vision of what is important,
mainly satisfying a simple daily need,
being drive to feed one's soul
where the parching
demanding to be filled
can never be satisfied
with a single drink.
However, it is hard to always remember
what really matters
when all we can think about
is getting that next sip.
A contest entry
- Conflicts: Good versus Evil by Stonecosta.
530 points, ended May 2, 2007, 33 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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A brilliant metaphor for the basic things that make us as humans, a so-called advanced species, so evil. Awesome!
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Thank you for the wonderful comment.
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Wonderful!!
Thank You for sharing this Sweetness
Gives much for the reader to inhale-digest...
Food for Thought~
I imagine many could relate...
Best wishes to You in the contest
Many blessings too
and my Love
~ Desire~*~
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Thank you darling. You always make me want good instead evil.
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I think this is one of the most meaningful poems I've read in my whole history. Its theme is so upfront and everyone can relate to and understand it. I think you captured the essence of what makes people so argumentative over things. You placed that idea in a wonderful and coherent metaphor.
The wording is simple, yet definitely intelligent enough to drive the point home without becoming blah. This poem has everything that a flawless piece of art has: Perfect Meaning, Phrasing, and clarity.
The reader doesn't become lost half way through the poem, and the work just keeps them enthralled until the end. As always, your way of narrating, makes it very neutral in the position. It's an overview and outlook of truth and no one can really deny it.
Brilliant structure and evolution. This was a complete pleasure to read; best of luck in the contest!
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You always leave me so amazed at the way you find every single extra thought and meaning possible in a poem. Thank you for being so encouraging and thoughtful. Your comments are sometimes worth so much more than any trophy.
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