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Angel of Music

Missing image

My teacher, my mentor, I love him so
Without him my music would not be the same
My teacher, my mentor, my maestro
The angel of music; he gave me that name

Without him my music would not be the same
After the fire, ashamed of his face
The angel of music; he gave me that name
The labyrinth is now his holy place

After the fire, ashamed of his face
He bids me to sing; his rage it’s true
The labyrinth is now his holy place
Raoul how I need you, what can I do

He bids me to sing; his rage it’s true
I know not which, my love or my passion
Raoul how I need you, what can I do
Maestro taught me to sing in this fashion

I know not which, my love or my passion
My teacher, my mentor, my maestro
He shows me such tender loving compassion
My teacher, my mentor, I love him so

 

 

 

Author notes

 Pantoum

The pantoum consists of a series of quatrains rhyming ABAB in which the second and fourth lines of a quatrain recur as the first and third lines in the succeeding quatrain; each quatrain introduces a new second rhyme as BCBC, CDCD. The first line of the series recurs as the last line of the closing quatrain, and third line of the poem recurs as the second line of the closing quatrain, rhyming ZAZA.

The design is simple:

Line 1
Line 2
Line 3
Line 4

Line 5 (repeat of line 2)
Line 6
Line 7 (repeat of line 4)
Line 8

Continue with as many stanzas as you wish, but the ending stanza then repeats the second and fourth lines of the previous stanza (as its first and third lines), and also repeats the third line of the first stanza, as its second line, and the first line of the first stanza as its fourth. So the first line of the poem is also the last.

Last stanza:

Line 2 of previous stanza
Line 3 of first stanza
Line 4 of previous stanza
Line 1 of first stanza

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 25 of 25

  • Sharon Marie gold member
    June 1
    Edit | Reply
    Here are my points forgot to add them to my comment


  • Sharon Marie gold member
    June 1

    Edit | Reply

    Awesome

    what a trophy of a write, where did you learn to write like this? Reminds me of a well written play . Awesome write you should win a trophy for this .very very nice!


  • Voodoo Eyes
    September 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting poetic form. I liked it. It shows how previous thoughts are still lingering even in other stanzas. I like how you took the lyric I gave. Nice job.


  • Faeryn
    August 11, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    "Brava, brava, bravissimi"

    Wow!! You really do love "Phantom of the Opera"! lol
    Excellent pantoum. I love how you were inspired by your favorite play.
    *in a Christine voice* "Angel of Music! Guide and guardian! Grant to me your glory!"
    Love,
    Tay

  • Eusebius
    March 14, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    bravo

    A very, very fine poem, indeed! I really loved this form as it has the power to transport the reader.... bravo... bravo... bravo...


  • Swan song gold member
    May 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I can see why this was a gold trophy winner. It chants and is somewhat desperate in its song. I think you captured this very well. Your just down right good.


  • Desire gold member
    May 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Holy Moly!!

    This is one Gorgeous verse You have penned and how in the world did I miss this
    If that ever happens by all means please send me the link to say~ Hey Lady Wake Up
    I think when my favs write a storm it moves the assembly line of pieces on my list so I miss pieces
    Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy~
    -I am so ashamed-..balls like baby

    I check everytime I log on...newest by favs..
    but back to this Gem
    Love the form and You are so right about it being
    difficult...
    but You did a Brilliant job on this and what emotion
    release too~ sigh~

    Best wishes to You in the contest
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


    • Amera gold member
      May 13, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Wow!

      Thank you! What a wonderful comment! You made my night!

      Love,
      Amera


  • Spiritvision angel
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Absolutely beautiful with its tunes of devotion to the mentor. the imagery allows the reader to see angels fly about these words of"The labyrinth is now his holy place" You just keep amazing us my friend.


  • myron silver member
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    A TANGO

    i enjoyed the tango of this poem. it's a very sensual dance and you have captured this same sort of beautiful soaring sensuality in this pantoum.

    it's neat, tidy, passionate and rhythmic. so full of desire and longing and appreciation. it's a lovely tribute and i hope your feelings are reciprocated. it seems from reading this poem, that they are.


    i like your technique of punctuating within the lines and allowing the endlines and the ends of the verses their own pauses.

    nice work,
    myron.


  • Asdzaa Nadleehe
    April 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Bravo...very well written..
    Peace
    ~M~


  • Jimfre Talbent
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Once again, you have such a wonderful grasp of the craft, that I am amazed (if not a wee bit jealous).

    Personally, I fare much better with free verse as I feel constricted by rules. Any of my works that rhyme, follow a rule, etc., tend to come out funny and aloof. I never can write serious work in form.

    I am impressed. Off to read more...


  • Tabitha-Robin
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow this is good. I like it a lot. You have done well with this. I enjoyed every line of it. Keep up the great work.


  • Starrchild777 gold member
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this was well written and the musicical content lent itself well to the form. A wonderful and artistic creation.

    ~*Starr*~ xxx


  • Jason Dorn
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    perfect

    I havent been around alot but I think I was led to this poem for a reason. I love the form you are a very talented poet. Deeper than that though I have been facing a period in my life where alot of things I have believed and hoped to believe havent proven to be true. My band has broken up and I was on the verge of a new band with an incredible guitarist but he just moved to Vermont to join a touring band on very short notice. I am happy for him but disappointed that our project is done. A dear friend of mine just wrote me a poem that reminded me that music my true love I will always be able to count on and your piece has affirmed that thank you so much. I didnt reralize you were a musician very cool. LOL I just read the comment b4 mine and realized this was written about a movie little matter it didnt change what I got out of your work.


    • Amera gold member
      April 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Jason

      Oh! Thank you so much… I love to hear it when my work affects someone. Sorry to say, I’m not a musician but I’m a big fan of all types of music. I think music is like praying twice.


      Love,
      Amera


  • Biciaksr
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    beautiful

    i especially love it because that's one of my favorite movies of all times and you were able to capture its beauty and struggles well in your wonderful poem


  • HighlandsGirl
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Perfect in form and rythm, this Pantoum sings its own song through your words. It has a visual appeal, an almost "pull" that the reader feels as if they want to know the Maestro and the angel. There seems such a strong connection between them, one of love and respect. A lovely poem! Best, Elizabeth


  • PerVirtuous
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent pantoum! The repeating lines are perfect in all places used. A great way to tell the story. Three bunnies for this!


  • duana
    April 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    interesting. I will have to try this form sometime.


  • Im3
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This style of writing is not easily handles, but you calm the challenge with ease. A special tribute to the one who guides you, I am sure that person knows your compass has been set for a while. They are merely taking the ride with you, you have the wheel


  • Whoochi gold member
    April 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I so LOVE LOVE visitng your page for I am always learning something new about form or anything about poetry...This poem speaks of sheer beauty and love, depp heartfelt longing, desire...Splendid. ty!


    • Amera gold member
      April 15, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Whoochi

      Thanks so much Whoochi. I love your comments, they're like presents under the tree!

      Love,
      Amera


  • Abby In Chains. silver member
    April 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I know not which, my love or my passion
    The angel of music, my singing aglow
    He shows me such tender loving compassion
    My teacher, my mentor, I love him so


    my favorite lines. how beautiful this is. good luck.


  • Dalaney gold member
    April 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    When I read poetry like this, I know in my
    heart what true beauty is. Love, Lane

1 - 25 of 25