[ I wish i could tell you what i'm feeling, ]

I wish i could tell you what i'm feeling,
But i cannot find the words to describe,
what i've done,
what i've done to her.
Heart break is supposed to come from relationships,
dating relationships,
Past, present, future,
or one that will never have a past, present or future.
Not a best friend,
a sister.

I wish i could tell you what i'm like,
But i cannot find the words to desribe,
who i am,
who i am today.
I've lied to and betrayed so many,
so many so close,
friends, lovers, myself,
new friends, could be lovers, destroyed.
its not who i am,
i dont do that.

I wish i could tell you what I've done,
But i cannot find the memory to explain,
what i dont remember,
dont remember of that night.
I persuaded him that i didnt want to,
i lied,
i did want to,
and i did it.
One look, one hold, one kiss,
one drink, too many, one mistake,
again.

Changed

i dont believe i did, thats not me, not who i am

Changed,
Blank

No memories to hate, to burn in my mind

Changed,
Blank,
Broken

She wouldnt look at me,
she couldnt

Changed,
Blank,
Broken,
Stranger.

I dont know who i am

I wish i could explain to you how im feeling,
but i dont know, cant remember,
who i am,
what i did.

I wouldnt do it to her,
Not a friend,
not a sister.