Sleepy hung the onyx-golden crags,
Asleep within the arms of pallid dusk.
Across their shades bright Sunset, glowing, drags,
His mantle in the darkened, evening dust.
The gleaming stars beam forth their evening glow,
Ocean catches, each, its fire, all aflame.
Within Her arms, this goddess that they know,
Calls to each, her children, by their name.
Such moment came upon us as we lay,
Abed, like Gods before the rising stars.
I cradled thee as Evening cradles Day,
Like Venus in the bed of warring Mars.
Primal Love lies mirrored in thy sleep,
Sleep, my goddess, Love's slumber deep.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Very Passionate!
Your use of imagery is very good. You begin with kind of a solemn tone and build too a very passionate climax. I like this one a lot.
My favorite part is:
I cradled thee as Evening cradles Day,
Like Venus in the bed of warring Mars.
Very good.


