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What you did to me

 

 

I'm on the edge of the fifteenth story

I want to jump and leave this world behind me.

Profoundly thinking, it seems like I'm fading

My treasured dreams are not worth saving.

 

You brought me here,

You became my worst fear.

Shattering me to nothing, as all fades away

Counting each breath, wont last another day.

 

You could have at least, given me a chance.

And have the pleasure, of one last dance.

But you just had to let everything fall apart

Breaking whatever was left of my heart.

 

Now before I leap into the blue skies

I’ll remember that look in your eyes.

The very meaning of my own life

Becoming the reason for all my strife.

 

I always thought you'd be there

But, in the end, you didn’t care.

Your music, was my echoed screams.

Your passion, was to break my dreams.

 

You just had to go too far

All because I wouldn’t get in your car.

You wanted to twist me, into something I’m not

But I want to be myself, I think you forgot.

 

What did I ever do to you?

Just gave you love that was so true.

All your abuse, and your scars of hurt

Why did you have to treat me like dirt.

 

So I spread my arms, as if they were wings

Freedom from all the pain you bring.

So I fell to the ground, somehow alive

Oh god, why did I have to survive.

 

Your memory shall always be in my mind

How could I have been so blind.

To think because of you, I almost died

Now that I've survived I won’t have to hide.

 

I’ll live my life, and go along

Hoping it wont be taking too long.

For killing the hope, you gave to me

And proving we were never meant to be.

Author notes

This was originally written 24th September, 2006
Needed a copy for myself

It's pretty much the Viewpoint of a Rape Victim
I wrote the pink lines, Justin wrote the blue

The comments I've added myself below ..
Are those That I want to remember from the previous write

In a list

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 19 of 19
  • DarkRomantic113
    April 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Closure is cool...


  • AngelDreamer
    May 6, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow this is a great powm it is so.... so... powerfull and tutching amazing truly amazing i wish i could wright like this, it flows so nicly beautiful and emotionas GREAT POWEM


  • XXBrunettexBarbieXX
    April 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this was a great write..your words were powerful..strong and emotional as well..i really enjoyed reading this wrtite..it flowed smoothly as well keep writting your very talented

    ~Chrissy~


  • ForsakenAngel
    April 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful

    Wow, you did awesome with this, I love it. I like the rhyme scheme and everything. It's really great.

  • OurxBeginning
    April 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, you two did a great job on this, and it's so deep and full of bittersweet imagery. Loving the ending, filled with hope. You both flowed your words extremely well. Awesome write, the both of you. ~~


  • silencethequestion
    April 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    wow great write. it flows very nicely and i really like the rhyming scheme. thanks for entering


  • Loveandblessings2u gold member
    April 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I really don't know how you do it, time after time your writing just becomes better and better. this is truly an magnificent piece the two of you came up with. this one has honestly left me a bit speechless.
    a remarkable piece of poetry.
    this seem to be a hard subject to write about, but you and your friend has done an excellent job. I am proud of you both.

    Granny Loves You


  • PoetBoy2008
    April 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow! another astonishing poem by an astonishing poet. your poems have alot of meaning and feelings in them it's like i'm the person in the poem when i read your poetry it's very very good.


  • Haunting Whispers
    April 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. Please give my moment to stare and think about this one.


    *stares*

    That was one of the best poems, and I could just hear the difference between the perspectives of the blue and pink. That was gorgeous. I loved it. The emotion you portray is stunning.

  • Ink4Blood
    April 13, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    ITS OUR COLLAB! YAY!


  • hollywood.
    April 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    loved it!

    Your music, was my echoed screams.
    Your passion, was to break my dreams.

    thats an awesome part!! i love this!! its so sad but yet... its just a great poem. great job on this, both of you!!!

    Your AP... yea ya know...
    -Tink


  • trista gold member
    April 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I really don't know what to say about this write, it's just that incredible... You've put so much emotion in it, and empathized with something I can't even imagine happening to me. The collaboration is beautifully done, seamlessly put together. I'm so glad you put this up with your other writes or I sadly would have missed reading it. Good luck in the competition...I think you did an awesome job all the way around!

    Much love and best wishes to both of you,
    ~J.


  • Never Fall in Love
    April 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Jbfisthebest - Joyce

    being rape, makes me sick to even think of it.
    this is so sad and heart breaking.
    so very touching, makes me want to cry.
    Sweet Heart: you and your friend has done a amamzing job.
    i am very proud of the both of you.
    this subject is very hard to write about, to even talk about.
    especiallly at such a young age.
    but you two pulled it all together perfectly.
    the both of you have done a great job...
    keep it up.

    NeVeR --- love you to bitzzz and pieces.
    love to your friend also.

    granny


  • Never Fall in Love
    April 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Manic Panic - Paige

    Wow!! You both did a great job in writing this.
    Your words here are very powerful, and emotional. It's truly an amazing piece of writing. I especially liked the lines, "So I fell to the ground, somehow alive. Oh god, why did I have to survive."
    Expressive, dark, sad. I like it a lot. I think that one reason it's so expressive is because a lot of people can relate to, and understand it. You did a great job!! Keep writing.


  • Never Fall in Love
    April 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Shakes-spear - Anthony

    So sad that one would feel that loosing ones life was better than going on. Rape is very bad, but the victom is not at fault. Don't feel like you are the blame. It was their sickness not yourfault. Hope things get better! the Shaker


  • Never Fall in Love
    April 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    xSallyxDollx - Jordanne

    Hun you did amazing on this you described so many of the feeling dead on; it almost made me cry I'm not even kidding you. This was amazing keep it up you guys!!

    ♥ Jordanne ♥

1 - 19 of 19