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Interference

The phone is silent except for
The occasional exchange.
Text and audio dubbed with attempts
To forget the pain we barter in.
Fading quickly into a contest of who cares less.
Trying to envenomate with indifference
But both coming up with dry bites.
A week ago we held each other as if we were
Keeping each other from spinning off into the void.
As if Gravity was love and Newton was cupid,
We accellerated towards the bliss of each others
Embrace at 32 feet per second squared.
So stupid we become on dead phones,
Ironic in their significant interference.
Waiting fot the other to budge,
Trying to detect tells and folding
Rather than face another broken heart.
Passion becomes the coin on which
Love and Hate are struck and we flipped it
Until it was dented and scarred.
Answering status checks with status quo.
When really, "I'm Fine," hides a sonnet
That could kill me if it fell into the wrong hands.
And I wonder if that means you...

Love Parks in Rosa's place at the back of the bus
And no King shall redeem it.
Yet, inspite of my self, I break the silence.
Casting past the interference of indifference
And send a message... "You OK?"
What I mean to say is "Be with me!"
And "I can't live without you!"
And "I'm coming, I LOVE YOU!"
Sending it...
Waiting...
Waiting...
Until I get your response...

"I'm Fine..."

Author notes

Is'nt it funny how sometimes you sit in silence on the phone with someone you were with for years, yet you don't know what to say...

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • Sgt B
    September 5, 2007

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    Hahahaha!

    This one cracked me up. I guess I'm gifted with the gift of gab. Yes I'm a "motormouth" so me & mine rarely have this problem.
    Great job kept me entertained the whole way through. Loved the ending as well.

    And send a message... "You OK?"
    What I mean to say is "Be with me!"
    And "I can't live without you!"
    And "I'm coming, I LOVE YOU!"
    Sending it...
    Waiting...
    Waiting...
    Until I get your response...

    "I'm Fine..."

    Having met my wife on-line I relate. Hahaha!

  • pruedence
    September 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    When this happens, I feel that you have finished in life with this person...your heart may not know it yet, but your mind does. Done is done...doesn't mean you have to hate each other. Some of the best friendships come out of relationships that are finished and they both realize together. Then as adults still enjoye one another in another level of life. Well said in this poem, I could relate..thanks for sharing

  • Sunbreathes...ra
    September 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Trying to envenomate with indifference
    But both coming up with dry bites.
    A week ago we held each other as if we were
    Keeping each other from spinning off into the void.
    As if Gravity was love and Newton was cupid

    These lines are truly remarkable. The other I called the man I loved to tell him that I still loved him and to finally admit how angry and hurt I was by his rejection. I felt it was the best way to do it. I live so far from him now and even if i did not I never want to see him again. Anyhow your piece struck a chord inside me...very thoughtful piece.


  • Purple Pen
    September 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    GOOD WORK!

    I was blown away by the depth of this piece and most of us can relate to that terrible silence. We don't want to believe what we know; there is nothing left to say. I'm not familiar with the word envenomate, but it does describe the action, doesn't it?


    • Purple Pen
      September 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      It is an excellent word. I didn't know it, but I knew what you meant!


    • Know1
      September 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      I haven't even thought about that piece for a long while. Reading yours kind of brought it back to the surface. As for envenomate, I'm fairly sure I just made it up LOL... it seemed appropriate at the time. Couldn't think of another word with the same effect. Hehe, maybe it will make the next dictionary edition


  • grannyeri gold member
    September 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Sometimes the phone is not the best place to say whatyou want to say - too impersonal maybe; face to face contact is best. Like on a computer where we can pretend and be who we want, a phone allows us also to be someone we are not. Interesting perspective you write about here. Sure many of us can relate to this situation.


  • Tarja
    September 4, 2007

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    OMG! Okay first of all... I loved the poem itself. It was very well written. Great word choice, wonderful flow, the works. You are a very talented poet. Now as for what the poem is saying... that is where you REALLY got me because I know exactly what you are expressing in this because I have been there myself. This was just fantastic. Wonderful job! HIGH FIVE!


    • Know1
      September 4, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Hehe thanks. It's nice to know I'm not alone


  • bw43
    May 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    i hadn't read this one. it's really... unpalatable to the heart. [i used a thesaurus]

    so yeah, it made me sad. because i know the intention of saying "i'm fine" and i know the feeling of getting the "i'm fine" male substition of "doesn't matter to me"





    line 5 made me sad. i don't like that contest. somehow i always lose

    line 11: isnt it spelled "accelerated" with one L? maybe i'm wrong.

    line 15 has a typo. "fot" i think should be "for"

    line 22-23 were really.... [i need new adjectives] vibrant with all the colors of sorrow.

  • JM Kenyon silver member
    May 11, 2007

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    A very nice love poem of heart ache and heartbreak and the thoughts that are left unsaid. *hug*s and best wishes always... ~Genie~


  • Sacrificial Love
    April 20, 2007

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    OMG...

    You are absolutely amazing... I can't begin to put into words how I am feelin' this piece...

    Great write...
    like a true wordsmith...

    xoxo
    Heidi

  • PalmettoSky
    April 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Love Parks in Rosa's place at the back of the bus
    And no King shall redeem it.

    i thought these lines were my fav's ...I really liked the witty way you brought them together and into this piece. thanks for sharing, kp

    • Know1
      April 10, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for the input. Those lines kind of seemed out of place but it seemed appropriate. I think I'll leave em in.
      It was kind of how I was feeling at the time, like I wasn't worthy to ride up front. Sitting in the back in silence.

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