Chips of guilt
Settle painfully
In my stomach
(original of course...
I needed the salt fix)
Laying in this empty house
Debating if this was right
Should I have devoured
The ones that overpowered?
Guilt
I buy it every day
It comes in bags
It comes in boxes
It comes with tags
And designs of foxes
Guilt
Guilty
Regret?
Salt
Sour
Salty
This is the taste of the failier that I am?
.This guilt trip duet.
It comes with words that I scream
It comes with fights that I create
It comes with every nightmare I dream
And it comes straight from fate
Here I sit
Eating straight from the bag
Bit by bit
The walls begin to zig-zag.
Guilt
It comes in bottles I buy
It comes in plastic too
It comes with every stupid self-lie
And it comes with you
Author notes
ADDICTION: addicted to the pain
A contest entry
- Guilt ... by Polaja.
700 points, ended May 23, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Emotions[:Options:]Broken Promises&&the Tears by WishMeAway--x.
550 points, ended July 30, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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It comes with words that I scream
It comes with fights that I create
It comes with every nightmare I dream
And it comes straight from fate
--those lines &&
It comes in bottles I buy
It comes in plastic too
It comes with every stupid self-lie
And it comes with you
--these lines. loved them. addicted to guilt i see to.
good luck
♥.love.
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A little Suessical but otherwise pretty good. I'm a bit put off by the rhyming as I'm not sure it fits well with the base poem. However, the end result is well thought out.
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Sugah Bear
I honestly didn't care much for the rhyming while I was writing this piece.
"Polaja" gave us the beginning,
and i just ran with it, put my own story into it.
but thank you for the comment anyways
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A very sad story
The way the story was told; through grabbing and eating/drinking AFTER the fight or problem, was very interesting. I guess every reader would fill this with their own memories and issues- it gave just enough away. The last line, I felt, was really well judged and gave massive impact.
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Squeezy
thank you so very much,
i appriciate that
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i know how you feel about get guilt on you every day. My life is the same way. So dont feel bad jess, the best we can do is stick together! kk
love always Rosey
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