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Life is a sexually transmitted disease

Remember those summers
  when you flushed out gopher holes with the hose
Because some one gave you the right to decide
that your god damn weeds had more of a will to live?
Whatever happened to mattress springs
Crumbling under your skin
And warm nights sprawled out on your vomit-colored futon?
Mosquitoes humming rock tunes in your ear
And bed bugs gnawing at your ears lobes
(
Because you just never wanted to listen
  to what the world was trying to tell you
.)

You’ve got planet dust crushed in your palms,
and Saturn’s rings swaying heavily under your sleepless eyes.
Flies buzz against your glass windowpanes
Because like everything else that lives,
they can’t seem to understand why
they aren’t allowed the freedom they want.
(
The grass is always greener on the other side of the flooded lawn?)

A flies life span only lasts a matter of days,
Even so, you will never see them slouched in a recliner,
swallowed by empty alcohol bottles.

They fly free until the day you decide
your sick of hearing that incessant, yet tiny,

 

thud against your window

 

.

  .

.

 

Author notes

I never know

Kind of talking about human-ego,
and how we think we are better than everything else.


(S.A.W)

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 18 of 18

  • silver-X-lining gold member
    September 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I loved this!!! This is beautiful, and conveys well your dissatisfication with life (or rather, the way we tend to lead it). And your dissatisfaction with the fact that we think we can decide on another creature's right to live. Good point...
    And the title. That.Is.Pure.BRILLIANCE.

    Well portrayed, poet. Write on.
    ~QoA


  • Swan song gold member
    July 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    That is a very good prose. a little disgusted are we?
    Dfineitly will be back to read again


  • animated lies
    April 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very nice freeform! I like how you established an almost-theme for the whole thing instead of hopelessly rambling-- although you had a mistake in this line: "they aren’t allowed they freedom the want."

    It should be "they aren't allowed the freedom they want."

    Thanks for entering!


  • makeout kid
    April 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You’ve got planet dust crushed in your palms,
    and Saturn’s rings swaying heavily under your sleepless eyes.

    i absolutely love the word choice && the image it sets in my mind.


  • anima bella
    April 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i fuckkking love this.


  • Jadeheart 41
    April 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Great write my friend ... very much deep thought here
    brings alot of memories to mind ... of times past ... all the what if's.

  • DeeJ
    April 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    this is amazing... its like thinking outside the box

    i especially like the ending, about the fly... makes u think doesnt it.. we are all going to end up like that fly one day
    xx


  • PlasticPrecious
    April 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "You’ve got planet dust crushed in your palms,
    and Saturn’s rings swaying heavily under your sleepless eyes."

    mmmm, this was pretty!
    great write lovely!

    BR


  • sweetpearl
    April 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    It's good, sometimes, to never know. It makes the writing more interesting for the readers and if you don't REALLY know, we can come up with explanations and you can decide "hey, yeah, that's neat" or "that's weird, I would have never guessed that" ... I love when that happens, muhaha.

    "Mosquitoes humming rock tunes in your ear... - ... to what the world was trying to tell you.)"

    --yeah, this is absolutely perfect. I want to make love to it right here right now!


  • Tinkerbell-Or-Me
    April 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I love this.
    lovelovelove.
    everything about it.
    you amaze me love♥♥


  • Moonshinesuicide
    April 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    wow what an amazing piece! i love this, some great lines and ideas flitting round, really well written, great job on showing off your talent,
    A flies life span only lasts a matter of days,
    Even so, you will never see them slouched in a recliner,
    swallowed by empty alcohol bottles.

    hehe great
    love moonshine
    xxxxxx


  • x.digital.love.x
    April 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    oh hunny.....
    breathtaking.

    A flies life span only lasts a matter of days,
    Even so, you will never see them slouched in a recliner,
    swallowed by empty alcohol bottles.

    They fly free until the day you decide
    your sick of hearing that incessant, yet tiny,
    thud against your window

    my fav. so far. great job hun.


  • InfiniteCaitlin
    April 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "You’ve got planet dust crushed in your palms,
    and Saturn’s rings swaying heavily under your sleepless eyes.
    Flies buzz against your glass windowpanes
    Because like everything else that lives,
    they can’t seem to understand why
    they aren’t allowed they freedom the want.
    ( The grass is always greener on the other side of the flooded lawn?)"

    Amazing doll face!!!
    Simplisticly, fantabulously amazing!!!

    I love your work!
    Great job doll!!


  • Glitter-Trash
    April 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Remember those summers
    when you flushed out gopher holes with the hose
    Because some one gave you the right to decide
    that your god damn weeds had more of a will to live?
    Whatever happened to mattress springs
    Crumbling under your skin
    And warm nights sprawled out on your vomit-colored futon?
    Mosquitoes humming rock tunes in your ear
    And bed bugs gnawing at your ears lobes
    (Because you just never wanted to listen
    to what the world was trying to tell you.)

    sweetie i love this
    you're AMAZING =] ily


  • ea silver member
    April 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow, very good. I never know either. lol. Love this theme. Am actually struggling with bedbugs myself now, no kidding, ah well, we do live in a medieval village and so it's only apporpriate that we would have this problem I suppose. I feel like I'm wearing a hair shirt at the moment, though, which is pretty funny considering.

    Getting back to your write (and I hope you don't itch after you read my comment) it's just amazing how incessant and tiny bugs are. The flooded lawn line is hilarious, btw.


  • Exodus gold member
    April 9, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I'm not sure what to think with this piece, I like it but at the same time it makes me think that every one is so insignificant it's almost sad.
    I enjoyed your use of description, and vocabulary. I am not sure what else I can say to this, I enjoyed reading it, it is incredibly unique. So thank you for entering and best of luck


  • CarCrashHumor
    April 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "Whatever happened to mattress springs
    Crumbling under your skin
    And warm nights sprawled out on your vomit-colored futon?
    Mosquitoes humming rock tunes in your ear
    And bed bugs gnawing at your ears lobes"

    wonderful descriptions darling.... this was powerful!

  • She Stole My Voice
    April 8, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "You’ve got planet dust crushed in your palms,
    and Saturn’s rings swaying heavily under your sleepless eyes"

    Baby,
    you amaze me everyday, every hour, every milisecond.

    [you forgot to put your name in the authors box Kat!]



    ~Princess of Shadows~

1 - 18 of 18