i.
water balloon
stretched, popped--
hatching a nymph
a mirror of the mothering
whale
at a time when she was of a smaller breed.
lightning captured
the awe of innocence;
and
left as quickly.
knees folded down quarter-sized circles
in her wake,
while tiny fingers reached back
in order to encourage
each blade of grass to stand up for itself.
new shoes for Easter
to turn them dark like moods
from hunting
the gender guilty of creating ripples
in the lake of a promised
"barren."
ii.
still on the same knees
but white rain joined the
slow dance
with tongues around permanent teeth.
an opaque door
revealed a new friend
who grew ten
sizes too small
as hinges trickled
over piano keys for comfort.
nights
made thumbs grow anxious
as they erected themselves taller
to gaze at the colored metals
swimming past.
iii.
images
raped their way into
the syllables she spoke
with each diamond accepted.
embalmed by foreign double-helixes--
and oh,
God bless you-
you're a woman, now that you've become an object.
iv.
eyes
dancing between a third husband's handgun
and ancient pages promising heaven,
arthritis hovered
over a molding notebook,
and clouds rested upon an invisible
crown,
but she still kept the honey
far away from her tea--
after so many years
of pacing through
"truth."
.
Author notes
a bit choppy,
but as is life, right?
In a list
A contest entry
- 1000 Points: Stages of Life.. by -ButterflyCuts-.
1075 points, ended April 20, 2007, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
honesty. use it.
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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That it is. This is wonderful, I'm becoming a bit redundant in my wording in my comments, all of your poems take my breath away. You're really good. I love your work.
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Very nice.. yes, it is slightly choppy. But that's ok, it's hard to get sections to flow easily..
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thanks so much for the bronze
-- you received some fantastic entries .
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"images
raped their way into
the syllables she spoke
with each diamond accepted.
embalmed by foreign double-helixes--
and oh,
God bless you-
you're a woman, now that you've become an object."
mmmm, this was yummy!
great write.
the words flowed so eliquently and it was easy to read.
great job!
BR
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muchas gracias!
♥
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"with tongues around permanent teeth"
--I just love this line ... it's really grabbing and the image is strong. I don't think it's choppy, but we all have our different opinions. I really agree with ea on this one.
Oh and the tea/honey thing was great too. You always know how to make things so grasping but so far out of reach at the same time.
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We're going to a party, it's a birthday party.
It's your birthday party, happy birthday darling.
We love you very,
very,
very,
very,
very,
very,
very much.
[-bright eyes.......random?]
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pretty words love..
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♥
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I can't bieleve this has only one comment
This is well thought through, poeticly AMAZING and so interesting and brillint
It really captures the contest, you've got a gteat entry
I wish you all the luck
You big sexy genius
Mucno love to you
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thanks so much hunny lauren! =]]]
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The title is really interesting in that the one thing that struck me was the trickle of water running through thé first half of this piece until you get to phase iii where it dries up.
there's much to be absorbed here.
Adding your comment:
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