Placid waters call
In tiny fresh water lagoons.
Terns resting from bays crested wave,
The paddle dipping,
Diamonds cast in sun-strewn spray,
Whirlpools kissing the edge.
Box turtles tanning on fallen pines,
Escaping the invasion of my prying eye,
Splashing in muddy bottomed water along the banks.
I feel sunlit cast, upon my face,
Hearing the slight rumbling taps,
Of ripples wake along the bottom of my canoe,
Sliding through placid waters,
In tiny fresh water lagoon.
Author notes
W.B. Burkholder
A contest entry
- Secret Place (for pre-writes) by aslanlight.
600 points, ended September 1, 2007, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Lift my Spirits by aboomer.
525 points, ended May 6, 2008, 32 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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Sounds wonderful! Wish I was there!
Beautiful wording, lovely soft feel to this, great images. A most enjoyable read!
thank you for your lovely entry
best wishes
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This is beautiful; you really make creation live in the reader's mind in this descriptive poem.
Peace Georgia
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ohhh this is beautiful reminds me so much of my college days and the blue lagoon next to the campus well done you have crafted an excellent poem xx
laura xxx -
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Thanks Laura, glad you liked the piece
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Fantastic!!!!!
I too, grew up on the water! Reminds me when I would take my canoe up to the end of the lake and up the channel, fishing, enjoying the outdoors, and watching the wildlife. What a fantastic piece!! Thanks for sharing. Keep your pen flowing. -
Powerful somewhat, I feel maybe the way you set the poem out. Seemingly unique from the latest poems I have read. Very lovely to read with a nice flow.
I love it, thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for taking the time to read and comment, I surely appreciate you kind remarks, thanks
http://www.freewebs.com/nirvanasgate/
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i loved this! It took me back to when I lived in Florida and canoed through all sorts of lakes, srteams, and inlets. You paint images very well and the sequence of events, the things you see and happen, it's perfect.
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Thanks so very much for your kind and wonderful comments
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this is an awsome poem!!!! The imagry is great...it was almost like I was there!! Good job and keep writting!!!!
♥ Ashlee -
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Thanks Ashlee
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wow! I wanna go! take me there! oh yea, you already have with your most excellent poem! thank you so much for the trip into a beautiful world! this poem lets me know why I love poetry the way I do! great job. keep them coming. peace and light, kp
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Thanks Kendal, hey please check out my new web site, would you be interested in being a guest poet??
http://www.freewebs.com/nirvanasgate/index.htm
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You have made this such a memorable experience! Everything about this takes a person on a journey of beautiful imagery....making this breathtaking and making each scene so real....smiles, Terry
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Thanks Terry, Theres alittle place along lake erie where these lagoons are located, close to where I grew up, spent a lot of time paddleing around and fishig in them, thanks so much for the comments
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Placid waters sets the entire tone of the poem and as a reader I can imagine gliding through the waters of your fresh water lagoon in a canoe.
I wonderfully descriptive piece to calm anyone, thanks for sharing.....Sue
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Umm i liked it very sweet.. Its nice and calm.. R u a very calm person
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A lagoon always speaks to me of a serene calm of nestled waters out of the ocean's rage and sight, you have given this the same feel. Love, C
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Wonderful images!! so peaceful, restful. I loved it!
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