Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

My future boyfriend

This is to a dear
Today as I come from work,
I hope my day has drawn near
For me to have my luck.

I know you are younger
But bestowed upon you are heavenly virtues
And my heart for you wills yonder
To perform all the lovers rituals.

Another evening, another day gone
I peep through the window, just like yesterday
And your eyes on mine they long
Words of beauty all drawn

The words we never say...
Not just yet.

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • YoureNoGoodForMe gold member
    July 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Very well written! I loved this piece. Ahhmazing=]

    "And your eyes on mine they long
    Words of beauty all drawn"

    Perrrfect lines right there! I'm glad I got to check out your other poems! You're a very talented writer!!

  • Endeavor gold member
    July 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Very Good



    Another evening, another day gone
    I peep through the window, just like yesterday
    And your eyes on mine they long
    Words of beauty all drawn

    Sweet gentle yearning

    Like this

    Rick


  • Silent Cougar Moderators member
    July 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Written in a fashion that shows true desired feelings for another, innocent to the core. A refreshing look at the needs of a wanting heart. well done.

    Maybe saying 'hello' just might break the ice.

    . Rewarded 4


  • freespirit51 gold member
    June 8, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    great write. you have a very unique way of looking at this subject. it is interesting to see what you would do in this type of situation. Great work, continue the great writiing.

  • someones-muse
    May 18, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    il like the peace felling I get from this peacr and the flow was good
    good job and keep up your writing
    ~My Muse~


  • paullallady silver member
    April 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    such longing, yearning, just an honest emotional write that touches the readers. You did a wonderful job describing this .

  • forever dreaming
    April 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ah any guy getting something written like this for him i very, very lucky. Such sentiment without being graphic or vulgar in any way. A lot of honest, genuine emotion, well penned.

    • mama-drama
      April 25, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      thanks a lot, if only the guy knew that I could actually go ahead and write about him!he's real sweet...
  • LeeKariss
    April 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Gr8!

    Wat a lovely depiction of Lust!

  • vanessa reen gold member
    April 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is so beautiful. I think this is such a lovely poem that so many people can relate to. It has been written with such sincerity and i truly enjoyed reading this.


  • Jeremy0826 gold member
    April 4, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your entry in my contest!
    I wish you the best of luck with it.



    Jeremy0826
1 - 12 of 12