Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

A Ballad For Claire

Dear sister with your heart so torn,

do not dwell on words he spoke.

For one day he will feel the scorn,

which you will be the one to evoke.

Don't let him make you cry again,

don't let him take all of the control.

I know at one time he kept you sane,

now he's left you with a broken soul.

I wish you well in forgetting all,

it's not as easy as they say it is.

Just remember it's your call,

and all of the blame is his.

Dear sister don't give up on us,

we will never give up on you.

He may've broke all your trust,

but to you we remain true.

******************

Author notes

For Claire my sister who has just broke with her partner of 4 years... May she feel better soon.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • daviscth silver member
    November 4, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for this beautiful piece. I enjoyed reading it very much and I wish you all the best of luck in this contest. Cathy


  • Corinthians13-4
    June 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    YES! Finally! Someone gets along with their sister! Yay! This is awesome. Good rhyme. Good flow. Excellent message!


  • Timeless Wisdom silver member
    June 22, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    A loving write full of care devoted for a love one. Great write and thanks for your entry.

    ~Raymond~


  • Tali28
    June 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    What a touching write to your sister. very supportive and kind. I really like your piece. Thanks for sharing. Good luck to you in the contest. Take care.
    Tali


  • Tali28
    June 3, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Thanks

    Thank you for your entry. When the contest ends I will comment further.
    Tali


  • Disturbed Prodigy
    April 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    you are a kind and caring sister, i like this poem, some things i don't agree with in it, but i like it, keep it flowing and good luck in the contest


  • xandercheerios
    April 3, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Ah, finally, a non-sonnet! I don't see why everyone prior to you chose a sonnet, ballads aren't that much more difficult, and odes aren't either! Beautiful write, a few lines that don't quite have a working rhythm, you may want to change them up... over all though, well done, and thanks so much for the entry!

1 - 7 of 7