The All-in Wet T-Shirt Contest. Def. NOT an Entry!
Now a lot of other countries think that OZ is full of ockers
which is true an’ it is also full of 'roos;
but they disregard the fact that Aussie sheilas ‘ave great knockers
which would knock yer colder than a can of booze.
I doan mean that they’re all whoppers, ‘coz they come in diff’rent sizes
but, fer firmness an’ their general contours,
in all international contests Aussie sheilas scoop the prizes,
bein’ popular with all them forren viewers.
Well, the average Ozzie cowboy doesn’t really give a bugger;
‘e‘s quite satisfied ter get ‘is weekly share
then ‘e’s ‘appy in the pub discussin ‘orses, booze an’ rugger;
(even cricket if there ain’t no kiwis there!)
I doan care if you ‘ave travelled from The Rocks to Gungadai
or ‘ave seen The Cross where girls go sellin’ sex,
or yer’ve stood an’ watched the bathin’ beauties topless at Bondi
an’ wondered wot the ‘ell would turn up next…..
Well, me grandawts in this pitcher are, admittedly, ‘bove av'rage
in them T-shirts with the cutaways in front
an’, although they get a few complaints about the lack of cov'rage,
they only does it fer a special stunt.
They are ‘eadin’ ter the Castle fer a Wet T-shirt Contest,
an’ will get first equal easily, I bet,
‘coz there 'ooters, once revealed, will be undowtedly the best
wen yer see them bulgin’, T-shirts clingin’ wet!
I suppose yer’ve noticed that I wear me ‘fficial Judge’s Pin?
Well, I’m scroopyewlussly fair an' may the bestest boobies win!
Hugh (Grampa) Wyles, April 2nd.2007.
Author notes
The above pitcher is showed wiv permishun of grandawt numba #1. (The wun wiv wet trowsers.)
In a list
- Huguelot Castle Capers • next in list
- Humour & Fun Poems • next in list
- Huguenauties Poetry (NE) • next in list
A contest entry
- for members of hugh wyles' favourites only! by huguenauties.
800 points, ended April 12, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Before I can sufficiently comment I need to know...they're at least 18 right?
What to heck is Mariza going on about? She needs to just chill out and drink some of that fruity tea she likes so much.
I'm gonna paste my face on some big chested babe and see what I look like....then I'm gonna paste it on a giraffe, a rat, a skeleton, a 747 and maybe even an ear of corn...oh yes, I have some exciting things planned...I'll let you know how it turns out....
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Dear Sir Ima,
I can't imagine how it feels to wake up in the morn
and find your face is pasted to an ear of ripened corn
or rat, giraffe or skeleton or other things you think,
when 'tween a pair of warm Brazilian boobs your face might sink.
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I want Am8ur's boobs!!! I mean, I want to have some of those instead of mine I'll be keeping Yem away from any wet tee shirt contest, he says he doesn't care if the boobs are big or small, but I won't take any risk! We all know the effect of cold water on skin lol
Very humorous and fun entry dad. Just watch your BP when the girls shirts get wet
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Dear Mari,
You shouldn't let the fact that Am8ur's boobs won here hurt.
Your tits are very special; they're Brazilian and they're pert
and, like Brazilan coffee, they have taste beyond compare
which, even in Australia, you won't find everywhere!
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What Knockers!
Dear Babe,
HAHAHAHA HMMM those two are up to mischief AGAIN!
Such a doozy of a picture of our Kings Grandaughts and Aunty Joan's nieces.
With those hooters they're bound to win.
I think your poem is honky dory.
Love Hine
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May the best contestant win the prize -
the men all win, at least the ones with eyes!
I can see you enjoyed writing this one - wonderful vernacular you have here! Best wishes.
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AWWWW! I we won't see you in this contest then?
Happy holiday Margaret.
Love and hugs, XXX Hugh R.
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Hinemoa says I'm to keep well away from this contest which she says is likely to be bad for my blood pressure and reading the King's eulogy and studying the picture with a magnifying glass I can see what she means. Pity. I think Hine intends to enter herself so I better not make any further comment.
Looks like Options #2 or #3 for me.
PS: I bought a pair of high-powered binoculars - just in case.
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the best boobies will win alrighty!
MINE! he he he
check out the titties on the brunette (me
) 2 think she's birthed 4!
n no one can top those.... not even the cucumber with the strap on
so if u intend 2 enter, dont intend 2 win cause i am hot n good i'm not n i will do just 'bout anything
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You are such a naughty king,
and you make no bones about it
if you could I'm sure you would
have a peek at each and every tit
But let's hope that your kin,
will be spared the oggleing
of grandpa king himself
it can get quite mind boggleing
Do put on your blinders, Hugh
step aside just this one time
to allow the other gents around
to see those lovelies in their prime
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WOO HOO!
Well, well, to see my two nieces here parading themselves in a wet T shirt contest is quite hilarious!
What a picture. They should do well but there's pretty stiff competion in the contest, they'll have to be veeeery naaauty to beat some of them. Great sonnet Hugh, boy I'm looking forward to reading ALL the entries that we get.
Love Bea
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