There is missing
driftwood to spellbind the poet
into an ode to water
and ripples and how little
death is thought of
in the cool of morning's breath
only the quack of ducks
as they paddle foot across
small expanse of mud,
rain- rolling beads
of water across their backs
as they break surface
for a full body dip
drop of a leaf from an old
crooked tree, leaning
to the left as if
even the dew
is too much to take
in its stance of age
and broken limbs,
as if heavy lacks
the substance to explain
how hard it is to remain
when birds vacation south
and a time smooth boulder,
perfected into
a pond side seat
for me to sit, skipping
flat stones across flat water
contemplating the lack
of words, contemplating
how easy it would be
to fall asleep beneath water;
share poetry with carp,
blue gill, while the slither
of a water serpent
tattoos my leg in a constant
circular motion
and perhaps together
they could teach to me
the art of drowning
peacefully--
Author notes
.
ophelia drowning, pt. II
.
just something...
Comments
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Peacefully.
sigh.
lemme know if you find that okay?
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The more I search, the further away it seems to run. I think I'll sit down for a bit, see if it'll get curious enough to come back and sniff... and when it does... I'm snatching it.
Ah. I think peace is like happiness. Fictional. One of those impossible visions that was designed especially for us fools. You know, the ones who are always searching for something better, something more... something.
Such is life, I guess.
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go green swimmer
the surface breaks under such strain.
ripples rolling off in round directions.
the lily liver trickles down like a river
confused into thinking its a pond.
Great lines about sleeping beneath the water, reading fish poetry and circular leg tattoos.
It appears that some of your other readers have also caught the Collinsesque reference to "the art of drowning" - that's a great book, poem and poet right there. Your words and concepts rival those of his - nice work! ~ Ed
http://www.moodgroove.com
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I rather like this one a lot. I enjoyed all of the imagery as well as the ending reference to the "Art of Drowning" which is one of Billy Collins most read poems I believe.
I think this perfectly depicts some of the feelings we all have when fighting to find words - damn that writer's block.
As I haven't read poems of yours in the past, I'm glad I can appreciate that my initial reaction was "this is very good" versus judging it against other writes you have that your peers say might be more favored than this one.
I think it's a solid poem...
Kim
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"Just something" poignant, yet very beautifully written from the heart and soul of a true poetess.
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the poem starts for me at "drop of a leaf"- and follows solidly through the end- lovely work- not bad for writer's block.. i should have such writer's block.
m
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I didnt quite ubderstand this one either, though it brings tranquility to mind, as if under water is a safe haven. Maybe I'm just stupid though...this is beautiful well written piece, and I really liked reading it...great write!
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Nice
OMG I am stupid. I could not understand much of this poem at all then again I musta missed soemthing. nice going meli another great write by you but this one stumped lil ole me but who cares much enjoyed reading it and keep up the godo work. 
Me
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Your poem has a serene and eerily peace to it.
Flows smoothly and reads easily.
Death is never a form of art. Don't be deceived by hollywood and the movies...
Nice poem.
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I don't know... i think if you drown yourself it could be peaceful inside your head-
but i guess your body reacts against drowning in reflexes doesn't it..
mm.. probably the worst way to die i think
lol- so much for writers block
this isn't your best, but it's still very good.
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none of us write our best... if we had, then we wouldn't need to keep trying.
lol if you are telling me it isn't my best (which is another way of saying it is crap... in a more polite form) then wouldn't that mean the writer's block is still firmly in place? -
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no, it isn't a polite way of saying it's crap- it's saying it isn't as good as some of your pieces.. but it is still really good..
'the best' thing is a figure of speech. I mean it in the sense of your very high standard.
I guess what i mean is that you can write better, in my opinion- which is very often wrong- but it is very very far from crap, and not the kind of things people write with writers block.. which im not saying you don't have..
gah.
don't twist my words, it's too late in the evening for that!
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LOL Ignore me. I'm in a very emo mood lately (which is why I've remained quiet)... just really frustrated at my lack of inspiration.
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Oh. This is a very nice one here. I really like it. It seems like it's so misleading though. Your voice is calm in this poem as you observe the world around you and when we get to the bottom of your poem we find out that it has a darker meaning of imply suicide. Or maybe just thinking about it. I thought your poem was a nature poem till I got to that part. But I thought it was really good, don't get me wrong. Just kind of sad about the end.
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drowning peacefully...I wish it were that easy.
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nothing is that easy, is it?
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