She once was a princess
with long blonde hair and a perfect nose
then she was rich and greedy
she wanted everything for herself
she stole from the poor
and gave to herself
then one day
her face started to fall
her blonde hair turned black
her nose grew huge
her stomach got bigger
and her chest shrank away
warts grew
and she became the wicked old witch
her beauty died because of her greed
and she died looking that way
A contest entry
- ~ The Best of the Worst~ by Florida Sunshine.
700 points, ended July 4, 2007, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Bad Poetry by Bapudi.
400 points, ended June 20, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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LOL ~ lordy! You are simply amazing! Thanks for entering my contest! I hope you had fun! Actually I don't think you write on an elementry level~ I actually laughed when reading it! So i think its NOT the worst~ Poetry is like beauty ~ it's all in the eye of the beholder ~ or the judge.... The important thing is whether YOU like it! ... the other is gravy! and NEVER let anyone make you feel like crap about what you write! ...
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This is too cute to be bad
I'm even gonna apopluad it just for fun.
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I want to be beautiful when I die
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wow, I am sorry for these people that critiqued this poem, they should be ashamed ... I think it is cute and it sends out a good message. I am embarrassed for these people, and that is sad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you enjoyed writing it then that is all that really matters, but people should not be mean, they should at least point out one good thing for some bad things ... then the critique would be balanced ... and it would sound nice, not bashing!!!!!!!!
again I am sorry
InKy -
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its not your fault but i did have to completely delete a poem on here becuz of the comments on it thay told me i couldnt write and that i wrote elementary stuff and that anyone who commented appraisals was probrally a bad writer too. it was bad. i didnt know people on here would be so mean so its nice to be back to good comments so once again thank you
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As I read this i was thinking "prose" then read the comments and glad to see i was not alone. This has little tempo and over simplified wording. The concept is there, but needs some serious polishing. Best of luck in this and all of your endeavors.
Hetohke'e * 
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I really don't like this. It was like broken prose; very simple, cliche prose. All you did was tell me facts in a very boring format, instead of showing me things and utilizing interesting structure. It's very choppy and plain.
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well i enjoyed writing it thats all that matters to me. hope it made you smile atleast a little bit. you might want to take the time to read my other poems that are more in my style. thank you i would appreciate any comments on my other poems. i take critique openly.
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This lacks good flow. The wording is very elementary. The topic is overused and too dull.
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there i made a few changes. any better?
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hey i tried. didnt it make you smile atleast a little?
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:)
Quite a crafty poem.
Neat beat to it too.
I like the story line and the flow.
Good job.
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thanx i tried to make it a story and make people laugh alittle
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