I breathe you like a curse,
It is a bloody death.
Writhing and torn,
I try to escape,
My poor old heart,
Lay cut and bleeding.
You brought me down,
You withered my soul,
In unending pain.
Author notes
My immortal soul lives forever. Option 2: Word Bank
A contest entry
- Options- AND LOTS OF THEM!!! by Darkened Seraph.
825 points, ended April 16, 2007, 17 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - DEEP, DARK, EMOTIONAL, ANYTHING! by Heavens Child.
425 points, ended April 10, 2007, 46 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Lets write a lovely!! poem for your EX bf/gf by Laura.
440 points, ended May 19, 2007, 92 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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amazing imagery very well done to you indeed good luck in the contest xxx
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great! I love the opening line "I breathe you like a curse" it's so dark and so beautiful! love it!
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SO HEART BREAKING
My sister your words are filled with so much pain I found myself hurting for you...I do so hope this is just a poem...:You withered my soul, in unending pain...EXTREMELY TOUCHING>>>
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As dark as it is, I enjoyed reading this. Excellent write.
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WOW!!! Very deep and dark piece my frind. It is a great read. I love the wordbank as well. I always love the challenge of a good wordbank. Good luck in the contest.
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Thank you so much for your comments and the applause. I do love the wordbanks!!
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Sounds like someone I know
This is a great write, another emotion filled one
Karen -
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Thank you for the kind comments. It was a wordbank and I so love them!
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Oh my!
This poem is a bit unexpected! It has a lot of scary and vivid imagery and is kind of emo. I really didn't realize that you liked writing like that. If I didn't know it was you I would never guess you normally like to write lighter things. lol 
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Wow, that is dark, Is the the wordbank you used for it, it looks like it, but could you add the option into the author notes i just noticed i hadnt put it as a rule and just edited it, sorry for the incoveniance.
The poem is great itself and the picture is fascinating and works well with the poem you have used gramma well, which is something i dont often notice and it incorpriates a lot of emotion into the poem, overall a great poem and what i am looking for well done
and good luck
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