Never

Isn't life meant to be lived
And once upon a time that chance people did give
But now in today's society
Everything is based on noteriety
Beauty is no longer a choice
If you don’t have it you don’t have a voice
Many girls are tortured everyday not only me
Because of something that in them people will never see
Movie stars and television glam
Has led everyone to believe this horrid sham
No real talent is needed for fame
Just good looks and no sense of shame
Young girls growing up
Feeling crushed like a paper cup
No sense of self or pride
All they know is how many nights they have cried
Pushed out of the scene
Favored over other girls no matter how mean
What is their to work for
No great feat those perfect girls would outscore
Few of us no how to survive
How to fight the world and stay alive
But even we sometimes need a hand
But all we find is reprimand
A shoulder we desperately search to cry on
But tears end up falling all alone
Until the sun does dawn
No kind words are heard or found
All our feelings upon are frowned
We learn to hold them up inside
Never to let anything in from the outside
Some just learn to fade away
Others project the persona everything is okay
If people only knew
How much this curse our life does skew
No more going out in public to have fun
We end up leaving the place before we are done
Nothing we can do is the same
Sometimes we are treated like we don’t even have a name
Inhuman we are expected to feel
Our emotions we are expected to kill
Never to love
Only to mask it like a hand covered by a glove
Do you know what it feels like to never have love
It’s like chopping the wings off a dove
Knowing there is no use in even trying
It will all end up with crying
No use in even wanting
For your heart you are just taunting
I know some of you think I’m being dramatic
But all of this is actually problematic
Still a disbeliever
Well here,this is my pain reliever
Ever since I started school
I have heard words so cruel
The only friends I ever had
Were later forced out by people being bad
I have always been top in my class
But always considered the fat ass
Nothing I ever could do or say
Would change the looks I got from every way
Even as I did become older
And more responsibility I could shoulder
I changed my clothes and my hair
Hoping that someone would for me care
Yea I gained a couple of friends
But they left me in the end
Even with me making straight A’s
Nothing could change the way I felt about myself everyday
Life progressed
Becoming more depressed
Though no one could tell
I was under its spell
Time still went
My emotions were becoming more spent
Middle school came
The years that many people are given a name
My life is turned upside down
I begin to wear a constant frown
I ended up having to reassess
What I needed to bring myself happiness
I made new friends to last me several years
And now in I have come to realize what I fear
I have missed out on my past life
For it was filled with nothing but strife
I have reached the age where I’m longing affection
No longer wanting parental protection
But the one thing that does make me sad
Is to see the things that for me will never be had
To most people all this sounds insane
But if you were me you would know my pain
Right now what are you thinking
Are you reevaluating your ranking
About how you tend to judge people
Do you feel you should repent under a steeple
Or are you glad you have been a friend
And know that you are a god send
Keep on reading to see how we all feel
The layers of emotion in this poem I peel
We wonder what the future holds
Shall we ever find someone so bold
As to stand up to the normal way
And to look at what we do and say
And judge who we are by that instead
Judge us what is in our head
I want to succeed in life
Cut society’s bonds with a knife
Throughout the years I was pushed around
I would try to get back up then be knocked back down
I shrank into the background
Never tried to get my name spread around
I would go through the motions
Showing no emotions
Growing quieter each day
Never getting in the way
Never  talking to a soul
For fear that of my words I would lose control
Never knowing what to say
As if I had the words memorized from a play
Life became regular routine
Performed so much it became pristine
I was saved from the rut by the few friends I have gained
Even though even over them many nights I have pained
For I could not imagine life after they are lost
On their friendship I can not put a cost
They saved my being once before
Alone completely I shall be nevermore
Some have even drawn me back out
Broken down my character which I had so carefully made stout
For after I drew back from the scene
I also had to make myself mean
To combat the assaults that did fly
My toungue became as sharp as an eagle eye
But some good has come from me being this way
A comeback I always have to say
My wit became sharper
I became less of a harper
I think before I speak
Yet my words meaning has become no more the weak
So needless to say all has not been a waste
But alas all this is just a taste
Of all the differences that we go through
If only you could know my pain too
All of this I know seems undefined
But yet it is clear in my mind
I have also learned through all of this
What I have really misses
Life is just a roulette
Not taking chances is something you will regret
We must take a gamble with our emotions 
Unless we are to drown in them like an ocean
We all live and learn
A new lesson awaits around every turn
Maturity never ends
We always will have something for which we need to make amends
Each year, month, and even day
More errors in our past we see and they start to seem like they outweigh
The current present that is going right
We dwell on the wish that our bygone days we could rewrite
We know not who has forgiven our blunders
Has our actions changed the course of a friendship we wonder
In a perfect world feelings would not go unseen
They would be spoken free, then life could reconvene
People would understand normal human flaws
Insecurity ,love, and depression would only cause a temporary pause
People should consider how they really feel toward their friends
If someone were to slander them would you defend
If they were to make you mad
Would you go on like it was nothing and to the fire just add
Or would you swallow your pride
And not let any problem go untried
People should think before they act
And not make false pacts
If everyone could experience what people like me go through
They would know what love is like when it’s true
They know that looks are last on life’s list
That there is so much more to know
Then what is put on show
Sometimes the girls that have nothing to boast
Are the ones that would love you the most
The ones that would never cheat
The ones that would run to you to meet
But no matter how much we plead and beg
All of this is just dredge
None of this will change a thing
Because beauty will always be king
Sad we can’t go back to a day
When things weren’t this way
When sex wasn’t the only goal
And young ladies for it would get scold
Back to a time where girls didn’t jump
From the sweetest guy to just some hot chump
Imagine feeling this way everyday
Read on and you will see this is not a feeling with which to play
My heart bleeds as free
As the tears that fall down my cheek
So much unwanted love to give
It is overflowing to the brim
Yet with all this love I have
I feel hollow deep inside
So many nights have went by
Where exhaustion has led to sleep
No more tears left to cry
Where is my love
Will him I ever find
Am I destined to be alone
To face this cruel world
With no arms to hold me tight
No strong hand to wipe my tears
Oh, dear god, send him soon
To end these torturous night in my room
Imagine feeling that way night after night
I’m not the only one who this must fight
If only the world new how much hurt it causes
How much people like me wish they could just pause it
Do everything they can
Just try to change their life's plan
For who knows what lies ahead
For we all must now think about the present instead
Yet many of us have many late nights
And think about our past plights
Burning old pictures we can not stand
Laying there wishing for a strong hand
Crying till we are so tired we finnaly sleep
Only to get up and into the rough life once more creep
Imagine only for that having to live
Imagine giving everything everyday that you have to give
Being as nice as you can to everyone
Putting everything you got into each task until it’s done
Striving to try to make up for what you don’t have
Desperate for words to heal unseen wounds like a salve
My story has been told
Though everyone has something to add to make it more cold
That was just a broad view
So maybe someone out there can make it relate to you
I want people like me to know they aren’t alone
And so yourself please don’t condone
And people who know not this feeling
Leave out words that could send us reeling
Try your best to change your ways
You just don’t know how many times you could brighten someone’s day
When you see someone crying them don’t ingnore
Because of how they look don’t them you abhore
Give them a chance and ignore other’s words
For your friend it only matters they heard
Show care for your friends
And that you will be with them until the end