The waves in the ocean
lap upon the shore
like my love for you,
they will last forevermore.
The waves in the ocean
are so powerful and strong
I need to be like that too because
my love for you was wrong.
The waves in the ocean
wash away all the bad
to set the newness free.
the waves in my heart
will never completely wash you away.
for when the tide comes in,
some of the bad remains.
In my heart, a part of my love
for you will always stay.
Author notes
another one, not very good..... just thoughts going through my head
Written July 10th, 2003
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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It seems a little muddled but maybe that is just me. In the end it is a poem about love, though it appears loving that person may not have been the wisest move.
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very good
I think every woman has a memory of a love that was wrong. Your poem reminded me of mine, 40 years ago. Your are quite right,you never forget. Your poem does what a good poem does, resonates inside the reader. Thanks for sharing your talent.
Thanks.
Edited on Jun 07, 8:55 p.m. because 'spelling error, (blush)'. -
Aint it a bitch when they jusy wont go away! well written says it all in a short write. keep puttin it out there!
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i think this is great! i like it..it's sweet, and i know the feeling. so i guess i can relate..and that makes me like it even more
way to go..good write! keep it up.
manda -
When the waves lap at the shore they take away the bad.
They take the rubbish from the sand
Don’t pollute yourself with his words of rejection
Find someone new who deserves your affection.
great write sweety. pretty imagery. sad though. -
Great write! I think it's cool how you used the ocean to show how you feel. Very nice! Keep up the good work! -Tina (hinamcmullen)
Edited on Aug 16, 12:48 because 'because'. -
wow, thats gr8 how uve linked the ocean to how you feel, i neva thought it was possible!! Jen xxxxxxx
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You don't think this is any good? I love it! Beautiful expressions and beautiful flow! Very rarely do you find a poem w/ both! Great work and keep it up!
*sonya*
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It sucks when you love someone and then you break up with them but you can't seem to get rid of that one little peice of them....Well written.
Sam -
when we have loved someone we will usually always have a love for them, its more of a long for the past, a love for how we have once felt, love cant turn in to hate,love fades away sometimes when its not meant to be, but a part of that love will always stay, and sometimes that is what keep people holding on to relationship, even if they are not hapy anymore, and are not inlove anymore, they loved it at one time and still feel a certain love there, good write once again ~nikki
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I really like this...it uses cool imadgrey and I can just see all the love...beautiful Write!
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Inspired. I liked this...
the waves in my heart
will never completely wash you away.
for when the tide comes in,
some of the bad remains.
In my heart, a part of my love
for you will always stay
I like that. Good writing here!!! -
cheers 22 fold
BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVO!
dose that tell you how wonderful I see your work is!?
My goodnes how your talent makes me blush from the lack of!
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Yes, its very good. I think its a great write. Like someone told me once that if people say its bad, who cares, there is someone out there thinking for just one second that they know they are not alone... Great write.
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