your wounds talk to me
like wind whispers to trees
your blood is sweet as honey
and your flesh is tender as newborn’s
bound together in this game we lay
and we destroy ourselves to feel alive
Author notes
Luthien
A contest entry
- red / overnight by Cat.
350 points, ended April 1, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - LESS THAN 5 TROPHIES ~~~~Contest~~~~ by Spiritual Nature.
425 points, ended March 31, 2007, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Everything deserves a chance, right? by ObliviousReality.
600 points, ended April 8, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre writes fresh writes, but there’s a catch by AngelDreamer.
330 points, ended April 27, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Extreme Emotion by JessTheRentyMess.
365 points, ended May 2, 2007, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - *~-* The Passion of Red *-~* by Dragonsblood.
450 points, ended April 18, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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verry well done but it feels kinda short and dark thanks for entering and good luck
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well done
aside from lack of grammar and pause this piece was well worded without any sort of simplicity to it. You gave the color of red a feel and a taste that I wouldnt of found on my own. One question: why say 'and we destroy ourselves to feel alive' which seperates wording and the feeling of time surpassing when you could connect the piece with '*as we destroy ourselves *just to feel alive...' Well done indeed and good luck in the contest. -
would have to agree with the last comment - interesting! i like the title...it fits well with the poem. and each line packs in it's own punch...really "firey" great job!
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Interesting. I'll have to read this a few times, with the help of another "judge" helping me decide finalists. Not sure I understand what it's about, but it is a good poem. Short, yet so complex. I like it^-^ Especially the ending. Thanks for entering, and good luck
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i like that you implied red without saying red- thanks so much for entering the contest
m -
Wow, this is great! I really like the last line. It's sad how true that is. Also, I loved the phrase "tender as newborn's"; that was great because you altered the cliche (soft as a baby's skin) by changing 'soft' to 'tender.' Short and sweet. Great job!
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thank you very very much.. i really love comments like this one
thats why i love this website..
you just made my day.. people just doesnt seem to understand how hard it is for me to write in english, but still, you got to understand my work.
i'll be retuning the favor, im going to read your poetry really soon.
thanks a lot again.
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