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the Night Before the Suicide

THE NIGHT BEFORE THE SUICIDE

A Gothic Horror Story

by Robert Davidson

I have killed myself
and today I attend my own funeral -
But last night I went down to the morgue
and there identified your body

Electric light gives a certain grace to the dead!
those awful slabs - unknown corpses laid out side by side
rigid forms cold on marble slabs

Water distends a corpse unpleasantly
parchment skin bloats a drowned girl
Your smile frozen, mocking - your stiff set lips -
and then comes a moment in which
I have gone through more than I lived in years

Speechless with emotion, I cried
life is very cruel and love the cruelest cut of all
If I could not have you, why then -
I gripped your dress and your flesh with it
and made you face the darkening river.
You didn't think I'd do it!

What should I do with my love for you?
hate it, fear it, because it is too much for me?
Such cruel stabs of pain love gives -
I stood on the very knife-edge of life.

In all things human there is a shedding of tears
as we struggle with each other for love
And now in a dream scream
I burst my skin open, letting the blood run
I open my throat with a knife.

As a ghost I stand by
as they lower my coffin into the ground -
In all the searchings of my heart
I have never felt more wounded, more broken, more alone
Your last words to me as keen as blade-thrusts -
Now knowing my soul would never rest
I knew my defeat was complete.

Copyright 2006

http://www.robertdavidson.blogsource.com

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 16 of 16

  • Never Fall in Love
    August 6, 2007

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    Hmmm ...
    This is quite different.
    In the fifth line, I especially didn't like the exclamation mark. It kinda gave a jumpy approach to the poem which took out the 'horror' of the story.

    Overall, the ending was great ... but not much catches me to this poem.
    Thank you for entering.

    ps. it might be better if you took your entry out from all the contests that have ended and awarded you nothing ... it makes this page more cleaner.


  • Summer Dawn
    June 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    very interresting write. thanks for your entry.


  • eating vertigo
    June 23, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very good, thankyou for entering...


  • Marc-Andrews
    June 22, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Looks like everyone said what I was going to say...

    Good luck in the contest


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    June 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This was kind of haunting in many ways. I could almost feel his eyes watching me and following my moves, as if I was the one who done something wrong. As well as disturbing it's quite sad really in it's own special way ♥


  • silver-X-lining gold member
    May 22, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I love this! Looks like you annoyed some people by not following the contest rules, but it rocks anyway! Very dark, very awesome... it really draws you into this dark, mildly morbid, captivating, depressing scenario that you create for the reader. Awesome description and word usage in particular.

    ~QoA


  • Atrophya
    May 17, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I fucking love this!! It's beautiful and I completely can relate to it!! kick ass!! awesome!! =]


  • Flightless Raven
    May 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    hmm...

    A bad boy of the contests, eh?.. i see that a few people were quite annoyed with your lack of ability to stick within the box... did you always color outside the lines?.. lol i liked this piece somewhat... it doesn't explain a fear, but it has imagery, and could be translated as a type of fear... we'll see how ya do when this is over, thanks for entering ^_^


  • WhatLiesBeneath
    May 3, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    This is an interesting piece. Wonderfully written yes, but I don't know. You flowed it very well, and it seems that you have been writting for a great many a years. You must say what opinions you choose though, otherwise I will have to DQ you. Thanks for entering.


  • XHollowXEyesX
    May 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    wow a very interesting and thought-provoking write. I love the use of language that you have used, it adds so much power and impact to the meaning that lies within the words. ALthough you did not place your option number in the authors box I Will not DQ as it is clear what option it is.

    awesome write. very natural flow.
    Thanks for entering and goodluck

  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    April 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This was harrowing and haunting. I like dark narratives, they speak to me like no other narratives can... as I can relate to them much better.


  • XXBrunettexBarbieXX
    April 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    oh wow...this was a really powerful write and i really enjoyed reading this..it flowed beautifully and perfectly..keep writting your talented and good luck in the contest

    ~Chrissy~


  • burdened
    April 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    An interesting piece, it made me think a bit, and I had to read it a few times to start to comprehend what was happening, or had happened. A good piece, and thanks for your entry. Take care XxX


  • Whoochi gold member
    April 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh superb take on this and loved the metaphors and symbolism used throughout..." stood on the very knife-edge of life.." This truly gave me goosebumps.....


  • Lady-Pegasus
    April 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your contest submission, I do need to ask you review the rules and edit your submission appropriately. Please reply IN COMMENTS to me and let me know this has been done, thank you. Also, I will review this tomorrow but i do believe that this is against one of my rules in there as far as content.


  • XXStOlEn-HaLoXx
    March 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is good, but it has to be your poems that you write! I don't like to do this, but your gonna have to write your own stuff of I'm gonna have to DQ you...

1 - 16 of 16