loving you was simple
it came so naturally
our eyes were filled with wonder
our souls were wild and free
no need to talk about anything
or worry about anyone...
we would lay outside in the soft, green grass
and just forget the world
life was passing as a dream
full of tenderness and love
blessed, it seemed, by God
watching from above
then, something changed,
was lost, or went astray
fearful feelings that ran too deep,
perhaps they pushed you away
I have to take back my heart
from that jar up on your shelf
it can’t survive in loneliness,
loving all by itself
it starves for your affection,
and the longing has broken it in two
I have to take back my heart,
and hope that it stops loving you...
a person can only bend
so much, and then they break
and your rigid set of rules...
love should be give and take
I’ve given all I can
there’s nothing left inside
I’ll take my battered soul and pain
behind walls,
and there I’ll hide
how wrong it was for me to think
that I ever had a chance
when adoring eyes surround you,
and they steal your every glance
so take your swelling ego
live in the spotlight that you adore
let the others give you what you need
I’m done, I can’t take any more
I have to take back my heart
from that jar up on your shelf
it can’t survive in loneliness,
loving all by itself
it starves for your affection,
and the longing has broken it in two
I have to take back my heart,
and hope that it stops loving you...
Author notes
Pain in it's rawest form...like a finger drawn across the crust of a wound beginning to heal. Nothing in the world hurts more than knowing the love you give isn't enough to get someone to bend their iron clad rules of yesteryear. To everyone who has ever given all they had only to be destroyed by memories from someone else's past...I dedicate this to you...
I personally see this being done as a ballad. Not sure who would be doing the track itself, but whoever it is, I think a male because I myself am one.
As to what inspired this...I hope the first paragraph is good enough...
A contest entry
- YOUR MOST PAINFUL EXPERIENCE by bitter scarecrow.
750 points, ended April 3, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ♥x♥ Lyrics ♥x♥ by xxRainbowDawnxx.
420 points, ended September 11, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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sorry...the comment submitted itself before I finished. Ballads also speak beautiful on those loves that once were and the loves you have lost. Beautifully written.
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Such a beautiful write of love... the type that is innocent and special to those involved and just plain beautiful to those that can see it on the outside world, would sound good as a ballad type song to me!
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'I'm Taking Back My Heart'...
thats what I once thought to do...
but it don't always work the way we think it too...
the heart spills forth things that shoulkd be left concealed some times...
anyways;
I thank you for letting me read some of you again...as always...
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I love what is mentioned in the notes. It basically sums up everything in the poem which was beautifully written as I am going through it now too. Someone was the victim of my ego the last time although now we are best friends and I think karma is coming around this time.Now I know how it really feels.
nice work!
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Beautiful
Words cannot express what I feel right now. This is just beautiful. Deep and so perfect. You capture the feeling so well. I am going through something similar too and it feels nice to know that I am not alone. The pain in this piece just shouts from every word.
My favourite lines were:
and the longing has broken it in two
I have to take back my heart,
and hope that it stops loving you...
I am lost in awe. I almost cried after I read this because the emotions were spilling out in this piece. Incredibly beautiful. I hope the pain has lessened and that the hurt has healed. Keep on writing- you are such a talented poet!
Love
Poetess99
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I'm doing alright Poetess...time will heal everything eventually. I hope that you, too, are healing and feeling a little better. Thanks for taking the time to stop by and check this out. Take care
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wow
this is one of the poems in my contest that clearly expresses true pain.
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...thank you for writing this...I've been there before and it hurts so much, and it's hard to talk about..but you managed, with honesty....thank you again
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Thank you Cai. I know that soooooooo many have been exactly in this very same place and can relate to this...but it sure doesn't make it any easier. Honesty, I guess, only goes so far...until things are pointed out that someone doesn't agree with or really didn't care to see. The truth hurts sometimes...but I will continue to move ahead and just be myself. In the long run, those who stand tall for what is REALLY right are the ones who eventually find TRUE happiness.
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perfect
so emotional and touching this one is! I think many can relate to this and perhaps have their hearts lightened a little by your understanding of the pain....
Beautifully done!
Lynda
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Lynda...
Emotional...at this moment, I'd give almost anything to HAVE no emotions right now. Too many, too much...I just want this day to end so I can sleep and feel nothing. Perhaps in dreams I'll find my peace...but most likely I'll be regretting, even then, what I've done this day. Thanks a bunch Lynda
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This is one of those writes that grabs hold of the readers heart as well, and lets them feel the pain that you suffer through...I just love and so compliment the poem because the expression and feelings are yours alone, and the message you shouted was very clear...Congrats to you on that...I promise you though that living in the spotlight is not even close to what she thinks it is...There will come a day when all she wants is a dark corner to hide in, and be left alone...
That's when she will understand exactly what she lost...
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Dusty...
Thank you for your support Dusty, but once again I have to say that I take no pleasure in this at ALL. I have NOTHING bad to say in any way, shape or form. As horrible as this poem may seem to some, there were more tears spilt for her as this was written than anyone can imagine, and I know that more still will far. Both for the pain of not being near her, and knowing that this posting caused her pain too.
She may not ever see any of the things I've said here, but if she does, I hope she'll understand and know that I carry her still with me. Real love doesn't go away...and I know that I'll carry her with me til the day I die.
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Well you certainly accomplished what you set out to deliver to this contest; let out your deepest pain and raw feelings. This is about as real and as honest as it gets. The pain of it is palpable. You draw the reader in and make it very real. I'm not going to compliment this piece because I don't want to compliment your pain. I don't take it lightly. I will say I don't think you could make it any more strongly felt. I will wish for you luck in the contest and that you find your peace. Take care Brother. T
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Thanks Brother...I can't say I'm happy, I won't say that this is what I wanted...all I can say is that it's what I needed to do for me. I take no pleasure in this at all. Too many tears were spilt in writing it, and too many more after it was posted. It will probably gnaw at me for the rest of my life, but it's what I had to do. Thanks for caring T.
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Solidly emotion ridden write. Good job.
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Thanks Mark, I appreciate the comment. Hope all is well with you. Take care.
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This was really filled with raw honesty. Hurt can devastate our being..but it is also a stepping stone to learning..This was a sad and intense piece.
I hope you find the peace you are seeking..Be well
Soulful Woman
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Yeah...I can understand the learning part, and no more will I be someone's stepping stone. Cold reality has taught me something. Perhaps living behind walls isn't so bad...it's worked for others for years, so why not for me? I don't seek the spotlight though, and I could care less about being popular or adored by the multitudes. All I've ever asked for is to be "the one" for a single person. Not hidden away on some dusty shelf, but walking next to them in the light of day...for the rest of the world to see. But then, that's where cold reality comes in doesn't it...
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