Melancholy dreams
Overtake our magic world’s
Need for wishing stars so bright.
Ache for my embrace;
My heart yearns to hear your voice
In the evanescent winds.
Author notes
This was by far the most aggravating form I've ever submitted myself to. It's called a sedoka, and the twist was to make it an acrostic as well. I hope it [the poem] makes more sense to those reading it than it does to me.
"mon ami" is French for "my friend". I just found that out two seconds ago; I thought it meant "my love", and I suppose that's a credible guess, seeing as I am a Latin student. Anyway, I was writing it to accord to a lost love type of thing, but it works just as well for friendship; you know, that whole "we got older and the magic of our innocence vanished and now we're so distant" type thing going on. Does that make sense? I hope so, because I really don't want to rewrite this....
A contest entry
- Acrostic Sedokas {edit} by HerbalGoat.
300 points, ended March 31, 2007, 12 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What the heck
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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You don't have to rewrite it dear. It's a great poem and such a meaningful piece. Thanks for entering it, and sorry for the hassle it gave you when you wrote it!
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I'm just glad you liked it. Thanks for the bronze!
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That's funny, because it doesn't sound forced at all. and you're welcome on the "my friend" bit =D
It feels a lot longer than just six lines. by restricting yourself to the binds of a sedoka, you've evaporated away everything you could to come up with a very potent poem -
Mon ami means "my friend."
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Sine mon ami is a different language, please state what it means in your author notes.
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