Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

eidolon

your complexion
in the paled comparison to mine

is a ratio that's

laughable.

you waved your ginger skin
against shores of mobile county,
wishing white elms
weren't so closely colored
to my rind.

.
.

the sea reminds you that i'm here
sitting as a dream that's rocking

in its chair

 

that's similar
to ginger skin on ivory bone.

 

.

.

 

tell me,
i'm your ghost,
'cus i haunt you every night
when wind wisps curtains
in your room,

and stars align

like

 

yesteryear.  



A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • Mildew in PinK tile
    April 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "that's similar
    to ginger skin on ivory bone.
    tell me,
    i'm your ghost,
    'cus i haunt you every night
    when wind wisps curtains
    in your room,

    and stars align

    like
    yesteryear. "

    ginger skin is a very appeasing image in my mind. & oooo i definatly love the wind image too.
    whoa your like a rabbit hole, things get more interesting the deeper i get.

    [♥]

  • FindingFate
    March 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    As always your talent stands alone. You are original and wonderful. :f *hug*


  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    March 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Perfect last stanza - just perfect!


  • Kevan
    March 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow... this is by far the best poem I've read today... maybe even one of the best this month. I think my favourite part was either:

    tell me,
    i'm your ghost,
    'cus i haunt you every night
    when wind wisps curtains
    in your room,
    and stars align

    or:

    you waved your ginger skin
    against shores of mobile county,
    wishing white elms
    weren't so closely colored
    to my rind.

    But I like all of this. I'm going to read it again right now. Good luck in the contest

    ~Kevan


  • dream5111
    March 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "the sea reminds you that i'm here
    sitting as a dream that's rocking

    in its chair



    that's similar
    to ginger skin on ivory bone." is my favorite part good luck

  • Oya Ayaba Nikua
    March 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    oh, this is perfect. i am so glad you found me. and i love that poem on your author page too. this poem is perfect. i am haunted now and you have put in writing how i am feeling. i like it when i find a poet who is expressing what i am experiencing better than i could express it. the "ivory" is something that reminds me of the elephant tusks and all the hunting in africa that was done....so the ivory leaves a connotation of pain, betrayal and the natural haunting. perfect.

    • marrow
      March 24, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much! I'm glad it connected with you. I am starting to be a bit more upfront with my writing, so I'm glad that others are being able to connect with it.


  • MysticAngelEyes
    March 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    oohh so chilling, and ful of vvid iamgery that you've painted so wel with your words. Great job.

1 - 12 of 12