The loneliness that seeps beneath
The misery that feeds my soul
The emptiness hides underneath
Struggling to reach my goal
This is not enough
Hanging on by a thin, weak thread
Wishing to find something more
There’s days I wish that I were dead
But I think of how things were before
And this is not enough
I still have hope, I still believe
But day-by-day I am discouraged
I feel more pain than most perceive
Though I try my best to gather courage
This is not nearly enough
I know that I can make it through
Even though I’m not that tough
To myself I will stay true
Though at times it can be rough
I pray that things will change quite soon
Because this simply is not enough…
Author notes
I did my best at the time being. I just wrote the first thing that came to mind and went with it. I hope it's decent enough for the contest.
A contest entry
- 15 Titles~ Contest. Open Till All Are Taken!! by Rianna Bear.
600 points, ended April 3, 2007, 11 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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This is an amazing write. I really enjoyed reading it. The rhyme and flow were wonderfully done and not a single line sounded off. Very Nicely done.
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Thank you, no one has commented on this poem in over a year. I'm really glad you enjoyed it.
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Def. think this can apply to many a teenager out there!!! The repitition and alteration of the title at the end of the stanzas was something different, and I liked it. Very dark thoughts, with a hint of desperation and still struggle for "enough." Thanks for your entry and for sharing.
Rianna -
A very deep and poetic way to express the feeling often refered to as "Runnin on empty". The building frustration shines clearly throughout this write. I loved the alternating rhyme couplets, It's a style I use often myself and you pulled it off well.
Its a good and worthy contender for the contest and on a more personal note, *huggs you* Keep on seeing what tomorrow brings my friend. I've been there and didn't think I could make it but things did improve.
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Excellent poem...
I love the Darkness within the messege of the poem the part that caught me was...
The loneliness that seeps beneath
The misery that feeds my soul
The emptiness hides underneath
Struggling to reach my goal
This is not enough
Hanging on by a thin, weak thread
Wishing to find something more
There’s days I wish that I were dead
But I think of how things were before
And this is not enough
keep up the good work and hope you write more poems like this one... -
i absolutely loved this amazing part
I still have hope, I still believe
But day-by-day I am discouraged
I feel more pain than most perceive
Though I try my best to gather courage
This is not nearly enough
great job. nice write.
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