Flexible place, and we, flexible, too,
Emotions, and feelings, and all that we do.
In a far-away land, the always-so-close,
We choose everything we already chose.
We're living for future, so in past it will turn,
The past was a future;the future before.
We've learnt that, in time, the present won't last,
That always in present, is future and past.
Author notes
~By Masky
A contest entry
- Philosophy by RhiannonMari.
450 points, ended March 25, 2007, 26 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - One Hundred Poems by Lady-Pegasus.
700 points, ended April 10, 2007, 54 entries
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800 points, ended April 13, 2007, 16 entries
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2100 points, ended August 22, 2007, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Capture Me With Your Title by Dark Whispers.
421 points, ended September 25, 2007, 18 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Time by Angelo di Luce.
300 points, ended November 12, 2007, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Turn that silver into gold Pt. 4 by whispernthedark.
400 points, ended February 29, 2008, 18 entries
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300 points, ended April 14, 2008, 22 entries
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20000 points, ended June 2, 2008, 946 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Silver! by Cat10.
700 points, ended June 20, 2008, 32 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Largest Contest On AP!!!! by xxRainbowDawnxx.
3000 points, ended August 26, 2008, 1708 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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thank you for entering. this is a very unique piece and I really liked it! you did a wonderful job and good luck!
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Wow ... nuff said! lol
Thank you very much for your entry -
I really love this ^_^
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This is a very creative piece. Great write, thank you for entering the contest. Good luck.
♥
whisper
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AWESOME!!!
maaaan..u really know how to put words in place!!! wasnt predictable at all and kept one reading with wonder!!!! loved it!
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Aw, thank you!! I'm flattered you told me that!
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I love this wole poem
We're living for future, so in past it will turn,
The past was a future;the future before.
We've learnt that, in time, the present won't last,
That always in present, is future and past.
the ending was gold for this poem, thanks for entering -
I really, REALLY don't like rhyming.
I guess I should mention that next time I have a contest.
Anyway, I did like this. Very philosophical.
Good luck! -
I can Hear the ticking in this verse ..an excellent write
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Thank you for your contest submission as well as for following the rules. This one is very neat, except that there is some places i do not care for your chosen punctuation, it makes it a bit too rocky. otherwise well done. Best of luck in this and all of your endeavors. Hetohke'e *
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We've learnt that, in time, the present won't last,
That always in present, is future and past.
i love these two lines. they perfectly represent how the past, present, and future are truly all one! living in the present moment only lasts as long as the moment, and then it's the past, while also looking towards the future till it becomes the present, and then is past again. i think that is very well stated.
however, it appears that you had a rhyme pattern in the poem that was broken at this one point:
We're living for future, so in past it will turn,
The past was a future;the future before.
unfortunately that took away from the strength of the poem in my opinion due to the break in the pattern. if it was a longer poem, and kept that break consistent as it continued where it would rhyme, then break,then rhyme again... it might not be as bad or as noticeable. but given the shortness of this poem, it took a great deal away from it.
thank you for the entry! -
I thought of something similar when I was a kid and my dad said to me it was bad to think that way but I think you are absolutely right my dear.
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OMG!OMG!OMG!I dare call you Little Miss Confucius!!! this was amazing!the technique is faultless and the style is simply astonishing!again, you've truly made my day,Vi! well done!
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Nice ending! I am enjoying your poems! I like how they are fresh and interesting. Thanks again for a great read!
_creatress_ -
wow, that was really deep. i love the last two lines,
"We're learnt that, in time, the present won't last,
That always in present, is future and past"
they sum it up perfectly. i love it. it really makes you think.
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