Awkward-Hell Reunion

1      I walk into the room littered with relatives
All are about their business, mindless gossip reigns in family reunions
Across the room I spot father in all his whiskey soaked glory

2      A decisive nod as I approach carves out our etiquette
The table between seems an eternity, a stoic reminder
The wood seems an extension of our aloof personalities

3      I nervously fidget with my suit jacket’s lapel, and in response dad adjusts his low slung belt.  His cheap suit catches on the futrniture, a comb-over floats towards the overhead fan. 

4      The moment crystallizes as Dad catches my glare, all fury and doubt
My unabashed feeling shoots through my eyes and somehow I know he caught it
I see in his eyes that he noticed the grand disapproval of his paternity
In an instant he knew I did not deem him fit to be my father
And just after that instant a crippling look from him
A silent, sympathetic apology reinforced by a nervous smile

5      Sudden hollering from the kitchen breaks the death stare
Mother calls us to the dining room, and our moment is dashed away
I almost heard an, “I’m sorry”, but the commotion following drowned it out
It must have been what I had hoped to hear
A manifestation of my youthful longing for acceptance
And ill-received plea for help from a robot of a man
We sit akimbo while mom sets our places

6      The meal tickles my nostrils as I sit and fume
We sit and wait for an eternity,
The table epitomizes our feelings
My impatience grows as I avoid his presence
Avoid his smug stature
Avoid his shameless antics, why wear your wedding band?

7      His yesterday shave and last night eyes mime my feelings
Mother sets out a plate and I can taste the loathe as she eyes it
She speaks, uncouth,

8      "How dare you come about with that on your finger!"
He remains silent, all eyes on him

9      Rounding the table, he stops at my feet, and drops to his knees
In his outstretched hands, a ring
Behind it a solemn stare

10      He is out the door before the ring has left his hand
Mother collapsed at my feet in a feeble embrace
“Mom?” I sputter.
“What now?”