Remorse code
taps wistfully
only the clock tocks
as she taps her foot
because she's ticked off,
So I stumble through
the rue morgue
rueing all of the words
I could have said
left utterless,
In the stance of repentance
regret poses me like an egret,
shifting from one leg to another
unbalanced by my calm qualm,
Apologies would be apathetic,
contrition would not yield fruition,
in the nation of self condemn
I am at this moment it's soul citizen,
and so I walk with contriteness
to her dissapointed face,
lifting her chin tenderly,
then drying her tears with a smile
as I set free her sorrow
with a passionate kiss,
that she eagerly embraces
in acknowledgement of my woes.
A contest entry
- Ready for # 6? by poetryality.
925 points, ended March 20, 2007, 17 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I love the resonance throughout this writ. The imagery is subtle but oh so well presented. I instinctively "tapped my foot" after reading those words. LOL Talk about subliminal infraction! LOL Love the use of "egret" here. Very clever. What a genuine apology! Great musing poet. A captivating work with sentiments that follow the requirements here to the letter. You are definitely a contender!
Thanks for the times spent to enter my challenge. I wish you all the very best!
Much Love ♥
Renee
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clever title
I love the way this starts, I can hear the ticking
great lines...
So I stumble through
the rue morgue
rueing all of the words
I could have said
then the tender and passionate making up...sigh
great penning here and good luck
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Great title. I enjoyed the imagery and flow of this piece. Just a small typo - disappointed - one s and 2 p's! Great piece of work.
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Very interesting poem. I'm very impressed. I usually refuse to read the Featured poems, but yours caught my eye. After reading it, I realize that blank verse can have the same effect as free verse. Very good emotional outpour. Try expanding the poem, it makes me want to know more about the lives of those invloved. I understand hudung some things, but making such interesting characters (or at least transposing them from reality) is torture if they aren't expanded upon.
Best of luck in the contest.
Double clap for you! n.n
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i have never thought about using morse code as an inspiration for a write. i give you credit for doing so. i like the play on words you have used here. thank you for sharing your talent with me this morning. i am looking forward to reading more from you. viyanna rosemarie
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Remorse and forgiveness is like a egret that can stand on only one leg. Well penned.
BHolzner
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Making up is always so fun, lol, I like this.
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