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creating whispers.

there are people
  curling in unknown places --
sheltering from the storm

raising poppies along
this trail of skin
  looking feverishly maimed

it could be






but one word could be uttered.






"i think everythings just f--"
 
      "- no"

Author notes

28th february, 11th march and todayy.
the meaning in this is a bit hidden,
but i think everyone can interpt it in different ways.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Confetti Fairy-x
    March 26, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    "i think everythings just f--"

    "- no"

    GREAT ending <333
    x


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    March 24, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this is an interesting write from you. the ending is a bit shocking. thank you for sharing your talent with me through this write. viyanna rosemarie


  • metrophobiac
    March 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    yeah, random and powerful. my kind of write. good luck in the contest kiddo.


  • poetryality silver member
    March 20, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I see you are presently on line by the invite to chat that comes up after the comment is submitted. Please refrain from responding to my comment until the judging process is done. I really like the BLIND JUDGING concept. It allows me to never know who wrote what.


    Renee


  • poetryality silver member
    March 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Love the flagrant sentiments here. This reminds me of Katrina victims and the fact that they have never gotten a real "sorry" from those politicians who seemingly disregarded their being human beings. This is truly a deep writ. It never takes many words to get that point out there, and make people understand the meaning. There are layers written here. Reading between the lines often reveals much more than what's on the surface. An excellent entry. I felt the guilt-ridden side of things scribe here poet! You are a contender!

    Thanks for the time spent to enter my challenge. I wish you all the best.


    Much Love ♥

    Renee


  • sweetpearl
    March 19, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Mmhmm, must be hidden, I'm not sure what it means. I guess I could come up with some ideas but I'd be stretchin' it a little. I did like this though, it was worded well. My favourite lines:

    "this trail of skin
    looking feverishly maimed"

    --excellent, always a pleasure


  • March 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i honestly think you are an amzing write i just want to know how you do it...totALLY TOP NOTC


  • -ButterflyCuts-
    March 18, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Ah, now this is a poem.

1 - 8 of 8