She strolled through the garden
Towards her mother’s house
A place she hadn’t been for years
Glancing at the cactus plant before her
Where there used to be a large glass flower bottle
She had a flashback of smashing it
Her mother comes out to greet her
As usual with no accessories
In a cosy purple jumper and jeans
With her short blonde hair looking boyish
They stand with so much unsaid between them
Until they see the daughter’s son approach
They hear his voice
Laughing with his friend
The sound is music to their ears
He walks past the cactus and the pair move towards him
Shifting the shadows and brightening it
Tall, dark and handsome he has become a fine youth
As his grandma took care of him well
The boy beams at his healthy mother
And says “Hello mum!”
His grandma strokes her hair thoughtfully
Then curls it around her fingers
She looked at her daughter who had almost been lost
And says “I thought I was going to outlive you!”
Author notes
I was lost to my mum for years due to heroin/alcohol addiction. She took care of my son for 5 years until I came back clean like the prodigal daughter and she's so happy! The cactus is symbolic because when Dale still lived there I bought him a baby cactus. My mum would go in his room to water and nourish it. They grew up together in her care and now my son and the cactus are back with me, both big, strong and healthy and I take care of them both.
My boy's Dale, 16 and his screenname in allpoetry is One.
The cactus is about 9 and is called the cactus and doesn't write poetry because it can't hold a pen or type but it has gorgeous pink flowers at Christmas.
A contest entry
- Creative-Writing Workshop (IMPROVE YOUR SKILLS) by Girl With Guitar.
1350 points, ended April 2, 2007, 13 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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You paint a really vivid picture with your words here, and your description is brilliant. The last line really brings the whole thing together and is really haunting. This must have been difficult for you to write, so well done and thank you for sharing it. You're an awesome person.
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It did take a little while to get into it, but I love it. Great piece, I do however have one thing which needs fixing/editing. Just the phtograph needs to be first mentioned up where the flower bottle is, so it fits with the instructions.
Thank you for entering
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