Silken white petals
layer on layer
alive with white love.
Author notes
I am new to AP and this is my first Haiku.
I am 13 yrs old.This haikui is ode to my mother who's fav flower is the white rose. as like the white rose --she is so full of love !!!!
My name is Dakoda known on AP as musiconmymind.
A contest entry
- Options. Options. Options ( CLOSED) by forever dreaming.
450 points, ended April 4, 2007, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Choices! Fun! For only kids under 13 by blablablooey12.
500 points, ended April 15, 2007, 13 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Seventeen syllables by Hiatus.
1350 points, ended May 1, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - FOR 13 & UNDER ~ OPTIONS!! by Kiddie Contests.
358 points, ended May 11, 2007, 36 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - haiku me by maybememories.
468 points, ended May 9, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Haiku, Plain and Simple by Athena of Starlite.
950 points, ended May 27, 2007, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - haiku help please!!!! by HpWICKEDangel.
600 points, ended July 2, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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all mother's are like flowers, layer upon layer of love and other things. thanks for entering and good luck.
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Excellent for your first haiku,,,seems others feel the same with all the trophies you have gotten for just one haiku. A wonderful expression
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u didnt follow the instructions dipwad i have to disqualify you
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Beautiful... very beautiful. Theis poem is simply beautiful. Brilliant poem. I'm amazed by your talent. This poem is just one inimitable beauty. Good luck in the contest ((I'm sure you'll do well...))
Luv,
Kiddie Contests
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Ebullient!
Hello DAKODA {hint of a friendly girl?},
Wow, I could only think from the first two lines that you're describing a white tulip or rose. "Silken white petals" makes me think of slow rubbed felt in another reasoning lol. And then, "layer on layer," well many are stacked up.
Ha - I was thrown off a long ways but somehow got back to the point with, "alive with white love." I feel you used a lot of repeated words in here, but other than that, the aha is that the flower(s) were planted and wouldn't be there without your care to water them everyday and keep 'em living. It is also a gift from God, which includes the wild flora, and we should be thankful that they are here because of his kindness... with the "white love" being connected to a delicate lightness of reality.
So, the resonance is, as I see it, I don't know what species it is but could wonder with answers of my own like i told you a few already.
I am sure you'll do well in the three contests for your three line poem, it is fantastic for a 13-yr-old. -
this is really good. A lot better than my first haiku was, anyway. I really like how many people are trying out new stuff, and I´ll keep in mind that this is your first one. This is really excellent.
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Simple and elegant but not sure about the use of the word white twice in such a short piece. I am assuming you have picked the pre-write option. Thats fine, you entered before I closed it to pre-writes so consider yourself accepted. Check out a contest by tough cookie at the moment if you are interested in haiku. Well done and good luck.
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very descriptive haiku
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A simple and elegant image. Very nice.
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A short, but very beautiful poem about love. It's amazing how much feeling can be squeezed into just three lines. Best of luck for the contest.
DancingRed.
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