We shared so much
In our short time together,
And the time that we shared
Has made memories forever
So much I learned,
So much I lost -
Everything turned, toppled
And tossed
Butterfly flutters, then turns
And kicks . . .
Then, that sad day . . .
Was my mind playing tricks?
No cry, no movement,
not even a Breath . . .
As you lay on my tummy -
Perfect even in death
When I think of you now
At the age you would be,
A beautiful "big girl"
Is the child that I see
My little one you were,
My daughter you'll always be
And One -
That is us;
You and Me
A contest entry
- I Want To Feeeelll The Emotion(prewrites allowed) any subject.. by dragontuba.
600 points, ended April 3, 2007, 131 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me emotion by LaLaLie.
360 points, ended April 14, 2007, 116 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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So heartfelt, so moving, so sad. I am so sorry you had to go through this and will for the rest of your life.
Hugs for you
K xx
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amazingli solid
and way to close to home, i would give you words of praise. i would give you accolades of praise for this write.
but just all what you said is great and nothing can add to it
thanks,
i do pray this is fiction.
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Awwww So Sad
a loss such as this is never really gotten over.A mother never forgets the feelings of that little one within her.A truly sad time for a mother.You have placed a beauty in such a loss in the memory of your little precious girl.
Blessings to you dear
~Cheryl~ -
my gosh!
i clicked on this, because my name is dani as well!
but as i got to the end, i realized it was a poem for a child lost to some unknown disease!
i am ever so lucky to have two beautiful children and id die for them, and i worry every night that something is gonna happen to them to take them away from me!
i loved this poem, and u should keep up the great work and keep letting those raw emotions out!
well done
luv lilaussie
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I think this is one of woman's greatest fears. I know I dont know what I would do if I had to experience this...just reading about it makes my heart ache and now I want to go hug my baby girl - Im at a loss for words.
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A beautiful and sad write that has heartfelt loss. Bless the child who is in the heavens.
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Oh my what a most beautiful poem.
How very sad,it just makes my heart break.
Your poem has very good rhythm and the rhyming. And what a wonderful way to remember your daughter, with such a lovely poem.
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Heart-rending
A still birth is perhaps one of the great human tragedies.
They talk about a "ghost twin" and how a child will instinctively know that there is something missing, even if they were never made aware of the existence of this twin, who perhaps died in birth, or never developed fully.
I am not a mother. I have never conceived - thankfully, have never lost - a child. But I wonder if there is a very similar bond between a woman and her baby that transcends life and death.
As I read I experienced the pregnancy, the movement inside me. I watched as my perfect little girl lay still on my chest. I grieved.
This poem is beautiful. So incredibly sad.
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