I do crawl and mow to reach
the branches like a leech!
The birth of my coyness do leap
hidden my senses of love do I keep!
The loathing of the lust,
timid and trot at its best!
Seven stages dont I claim
but the beauty I do reclaim!
North, East, Westand East do I fly.
To scale the heights of the bare sky!
A contest entry
- (extended one more day-need more entries!)48 HOUR CONTEST (round 2)!!!! by Rianna Bear.
475 points, ended March 18, 2007, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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"I do crawl and mow to reach
the branches like a leech!"- great imagery in this part.
good luck in my contest
*Rianna -
nice
I rather like your use of description in this work. You have a nice simile that comes through. I am usually not a fan to short works - mostly because I don't think you can convey a truely accurate meaning in only a handful of lines. But despite this poem's length I do believe you have really captured the spirit you were trying to portray. And it is a good medaphore. I myself would not use it for I do not constantly change, I am constant with change coming slowly but surely.
I hope you do well in this contest. Aye, we are competators, but I think that is no reason not to admire a peice of good work when you see it.
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