No tears will you see fall from these eyes
as I allow the single rose I bought to fall
upon the freshly dug ground that serves as
your final resting place on this earth.
No shivers will you see course through my body
as I stand by the hole in my dress of black,
the wind blowing my hair in front of my face
and yet I remain a steady and still silhouette.
No words of regret will you hear escape my lips
painted with the light tinge of red that you loved,
the color of the cherry bombs on the dogwood tree
standing stiff some ten feet away from the grave.
I will not waste my time mourning for someone
whose heart could not be captured in any snare.
I refuse to mourn for a lost cause for even I
can see when I stand no chance at winning.
I deny the pain that wants to rise from taking
over my once fevered heart and numbing me.
I cannot allow you to take over the last part
of me that I am able to retain- my mind.
I was a fool for believing you when you whispered
sweet words of love on that beach the day we met,
seducing me with wild kisses and soft touches,
breaking down the walls with your olive eyes.
I was more of a fool for believing you when you promised
that I was the only girl for you who could make you
shiver and moan to the rhythm of my touch,
shaking with need as you take me again and again...
For a brief moment, my eyes met hers over the mound
and the corner of my mouth quirks up in a smirk.
I have won, I am telling her in my own special way;
she may have had you, but in the end, I won.
And as the withered rose thumps against the earth,
I turn away with mirth, my hand on the gun, and growl,
"Rest in Fucking Peace."
A contest entry
- 26 Letters, 26 Entries by SensualWhispers.
600 points, ended March 28, 2007, 18 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Wow Stunning!
Ok, I want to first off let you lknow, that I was expecting high things for this poem and you have succeeded and surpassed my expectations. Great job on doing that because it's not easy to do.
Now to the critique: Oh wow.. Very nice first stanza.
Very calm and very collected through the poem. I like that. It made you seem cold and very distant. Excellent way of doing this. Your descriptions are just amazing and fascinating.
Wow! Lost cause for any hope of change. Love the way that was stated. Love but hate at the same time. They always did state that there was a thin lin ebetween the two.
Wow, a very romantic way to start a relationship, but it always seems to change doesn't it? OMG! Murderer! (jk) I love the ending. Absolutely wonderful write. You've totally exceeded my expectations.
If I could rate you from 1 to 5, I'd give you a 5. You've done a spectacular job. You've made the finalist list. Thank you for entering and good luck. Kassie -
I must say you rocked the page with this all the raw emotion flowing out had me capitivated from the first line and did not stop until the final line excellently written
Bravo
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Amaya,
Very impressive! Everything about this piece is just wonderful. It's beautiful, yet dark, it tells a story, yet makes you wonder... it really is very, very good stuff! I loved some of the descriptions you used, i.e. the still silohuette, the colour of your lips etc, and I think it's very nicely presented indeed. The title was very intriguing, and the last line pretty much sums it up. I was unsure as to the reason of the gun, (did the subject kill the other woman?) and for me, it took a little away from the 'calm, sly, secret hatred' feel of the piece.
Overall though, it is supremely crafted and I'd like to thank you for sharing it...
It's really good!
Good luck in your contest,
All the very best,
David. x
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