Captured is the beat
Breath of conversation
When can we meet again?
Where will we
Be when we grow up?
I left the pace of your heart
The throb of your neck
Dark hair pulse against dark skin
Thin air escapes
Could this be the mountain I'd
Assailed
Could I have climbed the
Granite walls
Not knowing
You were mystery
Long before I would have known
Could have known
The depth these beats might have
Pulsed, the strength
Long now are nights in
Your wake
Long is the shadow
You cast
A contest entry
- Climbing You by truembrace.
475 points, ended March 25, 2007, 2 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Well done, congratulations~
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congratulations on the silver!
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There's such a rollercoaster of emotions in this poem for me. The verses in the piece come across with a timeless nature - the voice in it has hints of wanting, desiring, loving, ... with a conclusion that what was left was even deeper and greater than that in some other way (even if that was somber in some way).
I really liked this entry a lot! There were a few that really stood out for the style of the piece and choice of imagery - this was one of those few indeed.
Thanks so much for taking the time to enter your poem here.
- Kimmie
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This poem struck me as a love that is found (or discovered) and then lost. Your words are beautiful but seem tinged with regret. Lovely poem.
Helen
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This reminds me of first love somehow, like before you have any idea of what it entails. And all you're left with years later is that rush of yearning. It is beautiful.
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I found this rather haunting, seeming regret after a triumphant assault.... as though something blinded you from the actuality of the spoils. Very nice write.
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