20 weeks now mummy, you must be very proud,
I've grown nearly all there is to grow,
There's even some hair on my head!
I love to hear your voice and can't wait until we meet,
We'll have so much fun,
And share all our love as one in harmony.
I hope I make you happy,
I hope I bring you love,
I trust you with all my heart,
That you will love and care for me,
That is all I need in life, with you at my side.
I can hear a voice mummy,
I know it's not yours,
It's not warm and soothing but harsh and angry,
I'm not sure I like the tone.
This voice I hear mummy,
It's worrying me so,
I can feel your heart,
Faster and faster it goes.
I have a bruise on one of my newly formed limbs, it hurts me so.
Mummy I don't trust this voice it’s joined by another,
They’re too loud,
Something’s invading my home,
Please make it stop,
Please make it go away.
Don't worry mummy, I'm OK,
I flew up to heaven, you see,
I'm dancing with angels and singing your praise as I sit on Jesus' knee.
God welcomed me with open arms and told me I was special,
He said you wanted me so,
And that voice I heard was my daddy.
He said there are reasons why,
My daddy didn't like,
That way I felt,
The way I looked,
The way I smiled,
The way I sang,
The way I spoke,
The way I danced.
I asked God why.
And do you know what he said to me?
He said daddy didn't have the trust that you had in me,
I had a right to life, Jesus said,
But daddy didn't give me time,
To live the life meant for me.
If he had I would still be with you,
And maybe then daddy would see,
The way I felt,
The way I looked,
The way I smiled,
The way I sang,
And maybe just maybe he would hear the way I spoke and see the way I danced,
Then maybe he could love me the way you loved me.
I forgive you mummy and hope you'll forgive me,
For bringing you such happiness,
And then such misery.
But please forgive daddy,
As God has told me,
Forgiveness is the only way to live in harmony.
Author notes
Choice A
A contest entry
- Something Meaningful by A falling star.
600 points, ended April 3, 2007, 22 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Tears by bigXfatXemo.
525 points, ended April 17, 2007, 31 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - She sits in her corner singing herself to sleep wrapped around in the promises that no one seems to keep. by Starz of Heaven.
525 points, ended June 22, 2007, 25 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 100% Prolife (2 MORE OPTIONS ADDED) by duana.
300 points, ended October 24, 2007, 10 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sadness, Anger and Hurt by piccola.
900 points, ended March 31, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Your oldest prewrite poems and my 20th contest by stargazer..
650 points, ended April 20, 417 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 42 of 42
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T-T
Oh, I just want to cry now.. this was so beautifully written. I love how innocent it sounded and how forgiving the child in heaven was. I love it so much! Really, this is a fine peace if work!
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This makes me want to cry... I feel so bad, as if I am the one doing this to that poor child, murder and neglect are a wrong thing to do, no matter what
makes me so sad and angry mothers will do this.
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WOW
It was so sad... the innocent and loving tone broke my heart. This poem really shows the cruelty of abortion. Good job on this poem! And good luck in the contest. -
I like that you used some rhyme in this. A very sad piece and I fear too common a situation. Congrats on the gold.
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"Forgive them for they know not what they do", is what comes to mind when I read this amazing poem (again). This is a great poem from the babie's perspective- the person that needs to be taken in MOST consideration here in this debate, and that for some reason other's just don't see this very basic fact.
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a bulletin!? wtf!?
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This seems like a bulletin I read.. Well I'm glad that you incorporated another angle and didn't just blame the mom and yeah, good luck in the contest
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Good
um, wow. It's really depressing but it does really happen. i like the point of view too.
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I had to write it in RE when we were doing the subject
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this is very very sad. wat was your inspiration? good write good write
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This is a very sad write. Thank you for your entry best wishes xxx
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This poem was done very well.
It held just enough information without going into the gory details of abortion.
You chose superb words to describe everything and the way you laid the poem out was very well done!
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This is beauty and Im crying but its so wonderful. The sad part is its true, some people abuse pregnant women to make them lose thier children. But however you are very true Forgiveness is the only way to live in harmony.
Best of luck!!!!!!
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Splendid
The title should be 'I had a right to live'. This sounds me more impressive. Cominf to the poem it is spendid. I am myself againt female feoticide and hence I feel it has been written using my words. Then I wonder do I have such touching words. The poor tender babe in foetus!The melancholic note in the poem makes it so sweet. Keep it up. It is high time since we all unite and stop the practice of female feoticide prevelant in the Asian Nations. -
This is an awesome write that has such a deep and profound message. People not taking precautions and then not being responsible for their actions infuriates me. Very well done. Thanks for entering and good luck.
Jeannie
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This is awesome! A very sweet
and touching story that tugs at
the heart. It's very true that
we all have a right to live our
lives. It's very unfortunate when
people don't accept and appreciate
others for who and what they really
are.
Beautiful work here and thanks for
sharing it! Best of luck to you with
it in the contest my friend!
Jeremy0826
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Hi i have to applaud this for its gentleness and thoughtfulness, i too am pro life and this has suported all that i feel when some else chooses to end a life of an innocent child, i would love for you to read my poem The silent scream. it is of the same subject, you might like it.
good luck in the contest you may not need it because you have something special here.
Dolores x
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I am amazed
How sad, as the tears fall.I did not except this.I really think you should get this copyrighted for you and maybe you could have someone print it and you can distribute it to crisis pregency centers.It could help a women see how abortion can destroy more then one life.
Blessings Cj
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omg i cant stop crying....this was way too emotional for me too read....im speechless
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Fantastic
I'm very prochoice, and I'm glad you showed the important side of it. I'm glad you entered. -
Very poignant. Nicely written. There is very little I would change; it is so from the heart.
Thank you for sharing.
rous
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My husband read this, and literally cried his eyes out- his tears were falling on me! This is so moving. I understand it could be about spousal abuse rather than abortion, but either way, it is incredible, and shows the value of a child BEFORE they are yet born visibly on this earth.
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You don't know why it made your teacher cry? You don't know why it won all these trophies. This has got to be the BEST poem on abortion I have read, and had you entered my contest on abortion it would have won gold. I was just reading in Time magazine how anyone who considers abortion murder is an extremist, and tons of politicians who once believed in abortion no longer do. All I can say, is keep this poem by your side through life so n one can ever change your mind. You have your head on your shoulders, and your perception right on. You have conveyed in poetry what I wished I could, but never was able to. Excellent.
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Very powerful and meaningful. Well done.
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Controversial and depressing. Nice job. Good luck in my contest.
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This is very moving, and forced abortion in this sorts. I am totally against. It is not the mans right, his body is not undergoing these drastic changes, But I am Pro choice, in saying that If the woman feels she cant handle such a responsibility, it is her right to choose. But this is a very moving poem, that made me think aobut what I believe. andthe way you thrust a father in there, really brings out the menacing feelings of this piece. Great job!
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This is a breath taking piece.... there are so many different views on this topic... abortion is not something I believe in personally, I think it's a horrible way people like to play God... I've met woman who have both regretted and not regretted the decision to have an abortion. Either way this poem has provoked many emotions, feelings and opinions. Great job. Thank you for the entry in my contest.
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Beautiful
The truth is there about the death of a child during pregnancy. I love how you speak of comfort to the mother, and it made me cry to hear how terrible the father was. There are too many emotions that I can't explain. -
Awwww This was terribly sad and unfortunately very true.I like the direction that you went with this. Thank you for entering and good luck in the contest.
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this is a very powerful poem! its so sad that the little baby died tho.
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My daddy didn't like,
That way I felt,
theres so much to say...
but i dont know how to say it...
this is a great poem
keep up the goos work...
Caycee♥
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youve left me speechless and in tears
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A child speaking from a very tender (and vulnerable ) place. So, so sad.
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Beautiful
My gosh I can see why it made her cry! This is really very sad. I'm not against abortions, though I could never persnoally bring myself to have one. The first stanza was just so so sweet, it did actually make my eyes water.
It was really very amazing, thankyou so much for entering. I loved it! Good luck =]
Frankie xXx
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wow, so sad! you put so much emotion in this one, i loved it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im speechless this was jus5t amazing. the imegrey you used through this poem was amazing too.
keep up the amazing work
take care, much love
XoXoXoX
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Welcome to allpoetry
This is so sad but it has a peace in it. Jesus is the great comforter is he not. I don't know if this is a true story but I am sure that stories such as these do happen. Too often they do and I know that these littlest angels are sitting on Jesus' knee and watching over their mommies.
I encourage you to keep writing to read and comment.
God Bless
Tammy
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This is a beautiful and touching piece of writing, you've done a great job with this. Thankyou for directing me to this piece. Two similar pieces have such different messages. The message of forgiveness in this poem is perfect, and although I am not really religious, I like where you have taken it. It's such a sad thing for a person to go through. I'm not sure if you're writing about spontaneous abortion (miscarriage) or abortion by "choice" but either way, you've touched something inside of me. Well done on such a great piece of writing and good luck in the contest xx
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it is very accurate, we learnt each stage in school loL, what fun lessons we have...
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This is sad and it really shows different sides of an abortion. I'm not sure how scientifically accurate you are, but that's ok. This is a great poem.
Thank you for entering my contest. -
Thanks
Thanks for the comments, loL you have to remember though that I was in an RE lesson when I wrote this and come from a strong Catholic background so we are told a lot about forgiveness and never about what it can lead to! I think that's one of my favourite parts of the poem too! -
one of the very few poems on which i was hooked after reading the title and first line.
Your exploration of the abortion issue from the perspective of an unborn baby was truly touching.
If i had to critisize it ( and i'm probably going to get controversial now ), I would have liked you to delve deeper at the end, instead of taking the easy ending of "everybody being forgived and living in harmony". Unfortunately, the world, and this issue isn't as simple as this. Sometimes forgiveness can only lead to more pain and suffering, more wrong doing and immoral actions in the future.
However, having said that, the forgiveness message speaks broader than the immediate issue of abortion in the poem, and expands the poem into an entirely new ballpark, and for that factor, I liked it as well.
"I forgive you mummy and hope you'll forgive me,
For bringing you such happiness,
And then such misery."
My favourite part of the poem by far. A great line to almost end on.
-James -
Wow
Amazing poem. Very touching and moving. Great job
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