~by Gregg Rowe~
(Feminine Rhyme -- final syllable unstressed)
Yesterday we gave birth to our nation
Erected farms and erected cities
Now the leaders of our corporations
Take seats on a felony committee
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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the severity of the theme,in this case, gets lost in the brevity...get it out...let yourself 'rant'
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Absolutely Beautiful
Beautiful, sir! I love how in its simplicity it still gets the idea across...and brings to mind such cases as Mark Foley. Also, I like the rhyming. Feminine rhyme? I guess that makes sense...Yep!
Merci for sharing!
Akasha
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This is the first time I've read this form of poetry(feminine rhyme).Though one may feel that if we give a long and hateful speech to them about how they 're ruining our country..it may serve better.But since its just 4 lines,it adds all the more bluntness to it.
good job.
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Simple, with a good punch. Nice rhyme, too. I'm not familiar with the form, but you wrote a good poem, which is what counts.
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thank you
this is a wonderful way of expressing the anger we all feel..
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Briliant
You said so much using the least amount of words possible and I love it. The simplicity is what gets me. 4 lines can say so much. Keep up the good work.
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Now the leaders of our corporations
Take seats on a felony committee
Love this line. I love the meatphors.
Really nice rhyming scheme as well as flow. This is really good -
interesting
LOTR there was so many aspects you could have gone with here and a small verse seems to work pretty well a short time line of American history in a way once you were working for the community then you were robbing them nice I like it. -
You have just have mixed up your singulars and plurals in the last line! I would have thought they would have been in the clink serving 20 years in any other country.
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