sweet woman of mine
that gave to me
more, more than there
was ever the time to say,
I hear you sing softly
to my soul with sorrow
catching your breath,
between cries caught
in the echoes of days
when I could reach you,
knowing, knowing I was
at home in your heart
& the times I bought
you flowers, it was your perfume
that placed footsteps
that held me fast
& fascinated
as you arranged them
with such tenderness,
that I was touched too
& now flowers are funerals
within your mind's eye
& take you to goodbyes
we never wanted to gather
with relatives,leaving love,
like this
& I know the rest-in-peace
etched in monument of marbled moment
belongs to us both,
I shall be left to rest
if you can learn to live again,
for destiny decrees life
for the living
& deepest spiritual sleep
for the dead,
no one should exist
in the limbo of inbetween,
dance with the day my love
& drink to life, of life,
with a toast from me,
yes, I'll raise a glass
of guinness dear,
holding it over our emerald isle,
& down at O'Malleys
in the little booth we met,
ah,tis where I will remain
remembering there was no
regret in the roads we took
Author notes
"in ainm De" to denote I read the rules of the contest.
A contest entry
- Your Favourite Poem (for prewrites only) by Aussie Gypsy.
450 points, ended September 8, 2007, 61 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Irish Poems by JustWhoIAm.
600 points, ended April 17, 2008, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 37 of 37
-
This, this is so tender, so honest, intrinsicaly Irish without any 'stage-Irishism'. Just a poignant reflection with a mother/sister/friend of closeness bonded by a mother country.
The sadness of the flower motif was particularly strong, and I loved 'Dance with the day my love & drink to life, of life'.
Loved every word.
PJ
-
This is brilliant, the kind of thing I was hoping for in this contest... wow at loss for words... something unusual....
Thank you for taking the time to enter your favourite prewrite in this contest, I wish you the very best of luck
Karen -
I don't know why three bunnies are not showing!!! I hit the wrong thing I guess Hmmmph...
-
This was just beautiful! Excellent work and wonderful imagery throughout! I would pic out a fabulous line I loved, but I LOVED the entire write
~Tia
-
stunning...you're a classic writer, never to be forgotten.
-
This is beautiful. Your words painted a lovely, bittersweet picture for me, the longing clearly expressed! Wonderful flow throughout. Thanks so much for entering my contest!
-
Beautiful letter from the heart... I almost don't want to say a thing if by chance my words take something away from yours...sacred, soulful, meaningful, filled with love and compassion... Amazing how far we can travel when we aren't afraid to live and love - even when we aren't afraid of goodbyes. Utterly beautiful.
~ Nicolette
-
hitch hikin' that way...
in the genuflection of lost love, mostly loved and roads traveled, one might appear to be roiled in emotional turmoil, when in actuality there is a basis for a deeper introspection. resurrection carves marble like nothing else. these are excellent lines etched not only on the hard material before you, but deeper in the open soul where graves hold no sway over our memories. no regrets, indeed...
-
-
Thankyou for your insightful comments and for reading,it is appreciated
-
-
wow, how this came up on my screen made me think that just the first stanza alone was the poem and I was completely riveted by it-- it was so moving.
-
Such a sad write. But utterly beautiful. I wish that everyone could convey such emotion when they write. Good job.
--Nanners -
amazing...
So sad and so sweet...Good-byes can be so difficult even when we have been blessed with years and years of a shared life...when it comes to the parting, ah....
Brilliant piece of writing..I am off to read more of your stuff. Thanks, Mat
-
This reads as if you have a lot of insight into the person this was meant for. I like the "personal" feel it has to it. It gives it life and breath.
-
What a sweet goodby you've penned. Your love is palpable, the memories you share with us precious. I am particularily struck with the phrase "the limbo of inbetween". Brilliant phrasing, simple yet contains so much. Well done! My best wishes and good luck in the contest! Tom
-
Wow
This is was so touching, you have a very lucky lady, I love how you mention her perfume, as the scent of a person is amazingly unforgetable, I can still walk past someone who has the same cologne as my boyfriend when I was thirteen and instantly think of him. This is beautifully sad.
***Strangeangel***
PS - Happy St Patricks day -
wow...I am almost seechless, wonderful job, very touching.
-
This is a wonderfully and beautifully written piece, my friend! Much enjoyed this! I wish you all the best in this contest! Well done!
-
Deep
Beautiful flow - lovely imagery, sad and yet - well, I suppose I would have to say bittersweet. Sometimes the bittersweet memories penned are the ones that stay with us the longest. It was a pleasure to read you! -
nioce.
Many times in life we come across choices, and sometimes those decisions are hard to forget…for whatever reason. Our roads are always adventurous, and hopefully never boring. Thanks for sharing this brilliant piece. Harmony and Love, Stephanie! -
NO, no one should exist in the limbo of inbetween, well penned my friend...no regrets , thats the way it should be even if roads were different..Raise a pint for me...Was in County Cork this last summer, was awesome...Good job on this heartfelt piece!
-
Lovley, the way you wrote it seemed really natural and nice to read.
good luck in the contest~ -
Breathtaking
Again my dear you have written something that has left me with a tear in my eye. Theimagery in this is fantastic along with the way you have linked everything together. Every best wish to you and good luck in the contest
-
-
Thankyou Wishing you a very happy St.Patricks Day I shall think of you when I raise a glass of draught guinness to celebrate,am going to watch Ardal O'Hanlon at the comedy store,for the "craic" Just love the humour
-
-
I think I will think of this fondly when I go to the Irish pub tomorrow here on St Pat's Day, I will toast to your wonderful pen dear sister.
-
Emotion just jumped out at me in this one. good job! sadness creeped all over me, and i love that, it means your writing consumed me. usually i like rhyming, but this was just too good t ochange anything. i love it. the feelign is just there. great write, Love it all
-
This is a lovely poem-letter, and I don't know quite what to leave you in the way of comments. Although we were divorced some years-ago, today would have been the 55th birthday of my ex-husband. I didn't realize it as today until posting a poem and dating it...and then I came to read your poem. Even all our eventual differences aside, there's always a place in my heart, but you know...
Lovely, lovely writing...and other than that, I really don't know what else to leave you other than your poem-letter touched me.
Jo
-
Well written. Like the poem alot. Good luck in the contest.
-
Memories that hold such deep meaning. You expressed them here and provided comfort. Best of luck to you in the contest.
-
Truly Beautiful
WOW!! This is just so beautiful and just takes your breath away. I truly loved this piece and words express how many levels this poem as touched me. I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
-
Well done
Beautifully written, flow and rythem loke the rush of the flowing stream. Beautitul imagery full of lovely wonder.
Well done.
*Go with God* my friend,
Valerie
-
Stunning
Stops me in my tracks with breath withheld until the end, so wistful and sad, a soft and flowing piece. Well done. Best of luck.
-
This touched me on so many levels. Its flow just eased its way into my mind and took me to where you were.
Just a beautiful, softly written piece.
Truly loved it.
Soulful Woman
-
-
applaud this poem
That was sort of beautiful and the last line was right on the roads we take should never have any regrets good poem -
wow i love hte last line as well as te title the wasyyou write is so splendid i definelty hav to add you as a fovrite. My style of classic write please check my poery out too. I sawa buetiful picture
-
This is beautiful, reflective and tender, what a charming yet sad little piece you've written... superb as always my little diamond in the rough...
Karen
-
lovely write
a beautiful write..love the title..thnks for entering my contest.good luck..hugs honeydew.
Adding your comment:
1 - 37 of 37
