Down the rain falls
Splashing softly.
My ears hear the pitter, pater of tiny feet.
The rain drops
They are my children,
And I catch them as they fall.
Listen they speak
However softly, they do
And I hear their cry
Holding the rain drops to my ear,
I hear their stories
Their whispers of joy and laughter.
Like tears upon my face
A sweet sadness in its place.
They slip through my fingers,
And their stories have no end...
Catch the Rain before they fall.
Catch the Rain...
Catch the Rain...
Catch the Rain...
A contest entry
- 1000 POINTS FOR THE WINNER! by forget my memories.
1350 points, ended March 20, 2007, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
comparison not for direct copies
Poet (etched upon a pencil not just #2?),
"Catch the Rain" makes me read with my cheek against my shoulder and elbow on desk. It takes an occasion of sound that's dense with refreshment in its action if hours are the runs, and so the divergence to such experience of children it appears.
The drizzle of accidents seems to be in the forecast of what is unforeseenn with your preempting comfort on how to handle sudden weather, so maybe a mother can help realize one from just simply being weathered so to speak.
The stanza of stillness shows to tune in not only by radar but who is dear. It leads to something that caressingly has that staying on top of it attitude, not mostly by a window but for perspective of a parent that we can all relate to yet:
"Holding the rain drops to my ear,
I hear their stories"
Phrasing was phasing here :
"Like tears upon my face
A sweet sadness in its place"
like a season of expression.
The ending is shaped like a bucket for belief we don't just see things go pale. -
Wow. this is really good. this contest is starting to turn its self around thank you for the entry
♥
sam -
wow. simply amazing. This poem is breath taking and I love the flow of your words. You show great talent and I wish you the best of luck along your journey through life. I hope to read more of your work.
Adding your comment:
