My pain is your pain,
your pain is mine
no love like ours will they ever find
I will not let you commit this sin
I will not let you die within
Everyday that I see you cry
is another day that i want to die
I do not want you to go
I'm screaming,yelling,bleeding, begging "NO"!
You are my friend,
I will not let the Silver be your end.
but my life follows Time like a well written rhyme
for there can be no happy ending to this tale
Like always I fuck up and fail!
As i watched the crimson pain that you bore
Though all these years
Bleed out onto the bathroom floor
I stare at you in sorrow's tears
I bent down
like a king awaitng his crown
I grasped the Silver In my fist
I tore a Scarlet band on my wrist
I told myself "all is right"
as I breathed our final breath into the cold night
I wondered
As I lay there about the pain you could not bear
and the memories that we shared
and why you gave up Our final fight?
and why you could not see that my love was your light
but you could not
your were blinded by hate
and died an all too familiar Silver Fate...
Author notes
i tried to write a poem that told a story
the story of this one is
two girls,both struggling with cutting and trying to keep the other alive
one night one of them decides to end her life, the other girls walks in the bathroom and sees her dying and decides that she can't live without her,, and takes her life with the same razor.
A contest entry
- blades or love??... by my savior-pedro.
300 points, ended March 22, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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I really dont know how you manage to make this completely.....for lack of a better word, well-rounded.
You have a great gift.
Have you thought of getting published?
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i thought about it.. but finding someone to publish it is the hard part
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Aw yeah. My friend is trying to get her work published also, but thats her one and most prominent problem.
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amazing. i really loved the way you described the cutting in these lines
I grasped the Silver In my fist
I tore a Scarlet band on my wrist
i loved all of the raw emotion in this poem. you really captured the feelings and emotions so well inm this poem.
xxundeadxtearsxx
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this is so cool.
keep itup man...
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omg i absolutely love the imagery
i can picture in my mind so like clearly
and it is so amazing
and it does make you think
i love this poem too
-suicidal revenge-
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this was a really great write..it flowed very smoothly..your words were strong and emotional as well..i can relate to this write keep writting your very talented
~Chrissy~ -
Great
sad and deep , you inspired me into a new rythm in writing , thanx and great poem reminds me of some bad things thoughh,keep up the good work
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Very Beautiful
You,my friend,are talented. Very talented..I loved this. I am looking forward to more of your work.
-Megz
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beautifully written, i am amazed at the flow and word usage!!!great job and good luck!!
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I LOVE THIS!!!!it is so well penned and really makes you think very well done and thanx for entering
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You didn't include the option in your author comments. I can clearly see which it is, but if you could add it, that'd be great(I'm actually warning you, as I didn't the others, because you at lease put in 'rubber duck').
I really liked this write. I can relate, most definitely.
Good luck! -
what a touching write. so deep with such raw emotions. I liek the way you described everything, it made me picture every word.
great work. thankd for entering and goodlcuk -
amazingly painfully penned but is great read....good job
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wow
Casey ur write so beautfuly everytime i read ur poems i get chills it was great! o by the way who was it about if it is ok for me to ask? love ya monica -
This was mindblowing. =] I have lost so much friends and family to suicide and at the end of this you ask all the questions I have also asked myself.
Great job!
Good luck!
Taylor. -
WOW! you are truly amazing! I could read ur poems all day! Can't wait to read more! I love how you express so much in your poems and i just can't get enuf! i luv this part:
I grasped the Silver In my fist
I tore a Scarlet band on my wrist
GREAT JOB!! LUV IT!
*Molly*
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very good. I love this poem, and it is so perfect for this day. my best freind attemted her suicide and I couldnt think of words to stop her. I couldnt have read this at a better time. It is truley perfect.
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i love it!
like everything you write.
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thank you
thank oyu criddle that means a lot. coming form the person who inspired me begin writing..thank you
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so pretty..... :'(
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forgot 2 applause.. lol sowwy.
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me sad now... *crying* i wish i could write like you.. love the poem tho!! and i luv u more!!!!! lol
loves... -
AMAZING!!!!!
Oh my freaking gosh! i absofreakinglutley love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's amazing! great job caseybear! keep it up! i luv it and u!
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