AND A TEAR ROLLS DOWN MY EYE
When I lay and think, in my bed at night,
the day you'll arrive, seems nowhere! insight!
I toss and I turn, dreaming of you!
opening my eye's-n-checkin' if my dream came true.
It didn't.... again.
And a tear rolls down my eye.
weeping quietly in the pillow I hold.
Many sleepless nights I've prayed for you, for you.
God touched my soul from heaven above
He's answered my prayers for my guy to be.
I've never felt this lucky, God-did-this-for me....
That's a question I asked each day-n-night...
He must think your special 'n' I know he's right.
No other has made me feel so right....
my whole life was lived, just so we could meet.
All these thoughts and more just runnin' through my head.
I fall asleep not worryin'... but dreaming of you.
im sleepin' all alone on this special night, just dreaming of you, outa sight.
Each night before I go to sleep,
each mornin' before I rise
It always is your face I see
within my dream filled eyes
A contest entry
- Your best prewrite by glazecovered.
300 points, ended February 23, 2004, 274 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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Very heartfelt piece with a lot of emotion,wonderfully written~angelica~
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Thanks for your comment, i was actually thinking about that a couple of weeks ago, but this was posted ages ago and it was just the start of a song i was writing and hasn't really been put into much form yet, and hasn't gotten the corus yet or anything so yeah, i dunno.
I think it's a great idea thou
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I agree repitition would have been outstanding in this poem but it is outstanding without. You have a gifted writer behind this gifted pen now don't you??? This was amazing and a truly entertaining piece I loved reading it. Thanks for putting it on ap.
Good luck in the contest.
Shine Brighter,
Baby Star -
Aww, such a beautiful and heart-felt love poem. I thin kthat maybe it'd have worked better if you ended each stanza with "And a tear rolled down my eye", because I think repetition would work nicely here. But even without it, it's still a wonderful poem. I loved the flow, it just drew me in and didn't let go till I read the whole thing. Great job. Thanks for entering and good luck.
~Anastasia -
nice poem keep writing and always share your poetryfriend
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revealing
has great potential no matter which direction you want to take it.the meaning is deep and revealing.good luck -
this is excellent. you can feel the longing and anxiety, I like this. it has a good heart to it
David
PS thanks for you comments on Melanie Bott, appreciated -
Hmm. I like it. I can picture this as a song. I've written maybe...three songs? That's it. I have no musical talent so nothing will ever be done with them. I stick to poetry. lol. But good on you for writing a song...This is a song, right? If it is, it's great. If it isn't, it's still great.
-butterflyflight -
yeh it started off beeing a song n sorta got stuck between a song and a poem
i write songs sometimes.. *shrugs* i probably write poetry more thou, im going to start writing more songs thou.. -
Good
Good layout and word choices. I'm not sure why lower case sentences in place.
Not sure why this form? Typo?
im sleepin' all alone on this special night, just dreaming of you, outa sight.
Think this structure is better:
im sleepin' all alone on this special night,
just dreaming of you, outa sight.
Great opening stanza and reads like a song.
You a budding song writer?
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Great
I love this poem it made me teary eyed to say the least. I know every emotion that is found in this poem because this poem really hit home for me. it was a great piece and very well done. -
awwwwww...
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i loved your poem...sad yet happy...i think :-) hehe, just to let you know i gave the guy i wanted the poem and he told me he loved me..so your rite i did get him!
thanks! -
smiles.. thanks
im glad u like it -
Sounds like someone's in love It's always a good feeling to have someone to whom you can feel these oh so special feelings for. Enjoy it, revel in it, treasure it all.
A very heartfelt poem, kazie... made me feel good reading it.
By the way... welcome to allpoetry...
Dee
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