It's simple, perfect, and rarely saw
true beauty in its place
a random sight of perfection's awe
forever frozen in my mind
and destiny in broken law
stole the expression from my face
distracted from the raven's caw
eyes fallen to a blackened blind
to see nothing that I foresaw
darkness covers the daring light
it blankets the morning's sun
with little smiles in morning's sight
and the beauty of the world undone
hiding in the darkness' light
I see nothing that I foresaw
eyes fallen to a blackened blind
distracted from the raven's caw
and stole the expression from my face
And destiny in broken law
forever frozen in my mind
A random sight of perfection's awe
true beauty in its place
It's simple, perfect, and rarely saw.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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You're always surprising me, but also cause I didn't even know you posted this. Such a great write, like always. Keep it up. I miss reading your poems.
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I wont say what I've figured this to be... I'll wait for you to tell me so I dont make a complete idiot of myself... but it is very good... I even took it to work and showed it to a lady I work with there... she used to be an English teacher.. and loves stuff like this... and she thought it was very good...I forget what her exact words were but... "shrugs"...and koen down there I asked to read this... he's awesome.. and I knew he would understand the 'mistakes' that you made... laughs... so ya... I think its probably the poem I like most from you...truely brilliant Nick...
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I completely agree with the intentional syntax error, it makes a strange and entertaining read. What I love the most, and this is sad because i relate this to math, is how it is a near perfect palindrome, with the first and last stanzas being perfect (with exceptions to a few words) reflections of each other!
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this is a very endearing poem. A wonderful expression you have penned. But you use saw completely wrong throughout the entire poem. It should be rarely seen.
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well...this was a fine work, need a bit of reform, a little of spices and some other correction...anyways, shouldn't it be, "simple, perfect and rarely seen"
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"It's simple, perfect, and rarely saw"
Rarely should be used with the present perfect shurely?
Or is it ironic in being coupled with the word 'perfect'?
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nice
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