twisted and broken
words never spoken
forgotten on the tracks
take a beating
left broken and bleeding
never looking back
imagined the whispers
of shattered pictures
laying on the ground
with silent screams
and invisible dreams
praying to be found
Author notes
no punctuation or capitalization for a reason...
In a list
- A. Writes that make me think I may actually have a little poet in me • next in list
- C. Lyrics (which I suck at writing) • next in list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 26 of 26
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I actually find this very lyrical and it reads so easy, a dozen or more stanzas and a good country guitar and you got yourself a song.
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there is poetry in your poem....
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Wow - a real poet!!
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very sad
Makes me think of teen runaways. Nice rhyming, very accurate and evocative writing.
Long time no see, wanted to.
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Wow, this is an awesome poem. So raw and heart felt. I loved every word of it.
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Great word choice. The sadness in this poem is beautiful!
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interesting, it reminds me of Poe's Raven. Nicely written
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beautiful!!!! I love how this poem was formed and the way it flowed and everything... beautiful job!
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Its very E. Dickenson with the no punctuation or capps. in how she'd do that or have caps in the middle of lines. Its an amazing poem with so much for the reader to fill in.
NoL -
Great
im not a big fan of rhyme,but this one just has to be one of the best i ever got to read.
you got to describe a dream in such a great way..
sorry about my english, i just have to improve it, so i cant just explain all this made me feel.
so i'll be reading your stuff soon, keep it up!
PS: there's something worse than nightmares, and thats not dreaming anything at all, happens to me all the time =X
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I like the way this flowed. Good job
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nice poem. the imagery is good.i really like the flo
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wow, that is a very well written piece I think. The flow is perfect and the word usage is amazing. excellent job I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.
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Amazing
This was one of those rare poems that really spoke to me. Great rhyming as well!! -
Oh my gosh... There's nice rhyming there. :] I thought about nightmares and good dreams (peaceful ones) by the time I went through it. Are the dreams praying to be found when we rest our eyes for the night? Awesome short poem though.
~Meli
P/s: I was a bit hooked in by the summary. I like this poem though. ; -
nice one
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I like the shape of this
the description
subject
actions
break well
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Wow what a deep piece so full of vivid images, very nicely written. You made it flow together so well. Simply exquiste.
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very nice Barbara short sweet an with an of kilter rhyme schedule I have used many times. this is well suited to the title and well done period.
first line second verse. Did you mean Beating?
peace Terry
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Thank you
....beating.. maybe
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"imagined the whipers / of silent pictures", that thought/image is haunting. me likes, sad but not giving up.
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Thanks
My sister's husband is in a band, and he asked me to write more lyrics... I came up with this one and the other one, but.. .they're more poetry than lyrics.
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Groovy. Deep, and groovy. A little cryptic, which I like. The indent of the middle lines sort of sets this off in a good way.
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hmmm this was VERY deep and I love these kind of writes..very well done..hmm I know exactly what I'm gonna do for this piece
AmunKama
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Two Barbara's in one day; heaven. Thank you Ms barbara.
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this rips at the heart strings
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