Franklin County Pennsylvania
in such and such a year, this day.
Who played as a child,
with toys provided,
chased evil doers in the living room,
watched captain Kangeroo,
slept on the couch to noon,
or so, then chased the moon?
the Jacobins feast on your wine,
wear your shiny suits,
sit on your fine divan,
blood running from their shoes.
Mummy would tie your shoe,
Father would beam, over the paper,
and off you would go to school.
Where everyone played by the golden rule.
that silence in the still dirt,
a dirk in the pig
provocateurs,
of unclean
the prophecies of greed.
Author notes
Or "Lil Bush"
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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I like it, it's interesting. Good luck with the contest
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interesting piece for sure, i'm thankful Mark Witucke posted that or i would have had to look it up myself. great piece, thanks for entering and good luck
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Do you mean Jacobite? As in Put-a-Stuart-Back-Under-the-Crown.
***
Ahhhhso
Just looked up "Jacobin". Hadn't heard of 'em. Apparently they were a club during the French Revolution and
"To this day, the terms Jacobin and Jacobinism are used as pejoratives for left-wing revolutionary politics." [source Wikipedia] Marat and Robespierre prominant members.
So they ate cake after all
in the halls of nobility
while staining their carpets crimson -
My God you are hard to follow.
Still, as a last recourse, I read you stanza by stanza
smoke signals by smoke signal and still enjoy...maybe understanding will come with enlightenment or the Revolution.
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Definitely an interesting write. Thats pretty much all I can say... I particularly enjoyed the final stanza.
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The title is suberb.
Corporate America huh? I thinks.
to noon or till noon? (L7)
Little confuseled by the Jacobins -- who they? why they related to Amerikas greed. When you say "your wine" who you talking about. Probably need to research.
Once this had a longer title I think. Didn't it?
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a very intresting poem, very interesting. i think it is a very good and nice poem
the Jacobins feast on your wine,
wear your shiny suits,
sit on your fine divan,
blood running from their shoes.
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Delightfully random. And... well.. I suppose that's it.
I'd give you three smiley applauses, but one is all I can afford.
And the applause was for the usage of the word "provocateurs." Nothing more.
=p
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ahhh... i get it ...
------ so mr lute ... you don't like the english or the french..... hehhehehehheh
i do think that your historical based writes are fascinating, and even though we covered some American history when i was at school and college, it is subject my Dad has always been fascinated with, so I grew up with him reciting tales from all the books he bought.
i would love to have a debate with you on some of the finer points of the revolutionary times.... would be interesting, i'm sure
psssttt.... your pieces sometimes make me grab my encylopedias and dictionaries... which isn't a bad thing
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???????????????
I canot understand what you are trying to say. Parts of this write are good writing but the words are without meaning. -
Confused
I understand verses one and three but you lost me, in the final verse. I think I know where you were going with the poem...but just not clear. A lot of thought went into your poem and it is nicely crafted! By the way, my favorite verse is the first one because it takes me back to my own childhood and then, later to the days when my children were little! :-)
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wonderful piece...
al
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This is spectacular.
I make you mine.
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Some of your imagery is striking, Lute, but I must confess I don't have a clue what the poem is about. What do the contrasting images signify? A rhetorical question--it's up to me as a reader to try to tease meaning out of the poet's words.
Regards,
Bill
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weird
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