step back darling
what do you see beyond
this
quiet little girl
jeans and a t-shirt
easily conceal everything
and you dont fantasize
because you believe
me to be a simple
plain little girl
and this goes deeper then my plain
appearance
love struck
and br
ok en
you cant exactly piece me back together
because I'm a little different
I don't know exactly
how to explain
who
I am
and you might have to take
that one step closer
and take a moment
to get under my skin
A contest entry
- Who Are You... Tell me. by Lj-.
350 points, ended March 16, 2007, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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After re-reading this, I realize in line seven,
"dont fantasise" should be "don't fantasize"
In line sixteen:
"peice" should be "piece"
And in line eighteen:
"dont" should be "don't"
Good luck
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thanks much! fixed it
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You're welcome
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wow! i <3 this! my favorite thing is how you broke up broken, genius :-D . this reminds me of stuff i like to write
i see much luck in the future! [what im a fortune teller now?!? haha] no but really. love it [and thanks for the nice comment
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I really enjoyed the closing lines of this piece.
Well done.
Thank you for entering,
Good luck!
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