No simple words atone for my disease,
not even one a tributary ease ~
can by no means ensure the rise of dreams,
nor harken wisdom when the dusk is deemed.
I'm one who's found, not only through the mist,
but in the depths of sea; a glow resists,
and mid the fiery skies so much of woe,
that man could neither understand or know.
I'm one who has endured the many deaths,
who yet prevails as such a wrinkled myth,
that's incarnated 'neath a clock of doom,
to shape the silent talon of the moon.
No serving love save darkness can appease,
no simple wounds abound to my disease.
Author notes
Pogo stick
A contest entry
- Kindred Writer's (INVITE ONLY!!!) by PerfectImperfection.
600 points, ended March 25, 2007, 16 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Deep Dark Thoughts by Abstract Image.
330 points, ended August 11, 2007, 57 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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i loved reading this poem it flowed and had a nice use of words...good luck
~Wolf~ -
wow..tthat was wicked!!
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Truly Deserving
So I came here to peek at what poem won Gold, and I must say I am quite impressed! Truly deserving of the Gold trophy. This poem was absolutely beautiful. I adored the words you used and I also loved how it flowed. You write absolutely beautifully.
♥
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I'm in your debt
Seems like everyone is showering me with persistent praise.
I can find no words to thank you for being open-minded and mature.
Thanks again for your time, your applause and encouraging.
They mean a lot.
Be well,
RD.
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Congrats on GOLD!!!
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Hey heeeeey
My lucky week eh !!!
(Excluding the minor (suit-y) setbacks...lol).
My birthday and this, I think it's more than enough.
Be well, my friend.
RD.
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Your writes are filled with such beautiful and sophisticated language. Wisdom sprouting from the tip of the poems tongue, gently beckoning your reader to feel what is being sung into their heart. You are one of those masters of poetic art, at least in my book! Thank you for entering!
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Thanks a million
I am truly and duly humbled.
Your contest, is the one which recieve such flattery and applause.
Be well,
RD.
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ahh, such a wonderful write you are truly a very talented poet! Good luck in the contest!
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wonderful write..best wishes..
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AAAAA !!!
How can you do such a magnificent work ?!
I just don't get "Grumbles"!! Any way that's a GREAT POEM OVER THERE and I hope I can be like u in da near future "Prays"C ya
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Lol
I am glad you liked it.
And I am sure you'll be even better.
Write on young man, experience comes with writ and persistance.
Be well,
RD
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"I'm one who have endured the many deaths"
I believe "have" should be "has."
A piece I can really relate to. I especially liked the ending. Nice imagery. Very captivating. It pulled me in.
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Ahhhhh
Mind the grammer (smiles).
Always been lousy at it, in Arabic and English..
The thing is, in English though, I sense my phrases..
And unlike many who tend to revise and memmorize grammer laws, I let it flow, and intercept any flaw by sensing it !!
I am glad you liked it.
RD.
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Ah Raven, "a glow resists", yes I do so agree, " the rise of dreams". "I...have endured...yet prevail...to shape the...talon of the moon...no simple wounds"...so dark and sweet these words of yours. Lovely dark imagery and serious emotive quality. Tastes like Raven's blood....well done! (Just wondering though, in the second and third stanzas, should 'I'm one who've' be 'I'm one who has'? since in the first stanza it is singular 'my' disease, or are you using 'I' in the first stanza as the royal 'We'?) I still love this write...Peace, Rhonda
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Dear Rhonda
This poem was supposed to show my inner self or what I think of myself as a poet, and as a person with self-reflected emotions.
The contest requires it, so I fear this is just another selfish display..
Raven's blood you say...Hmmmmmmm (not sure about that..lol).
Thank you for your time,
Be well,
RD.
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*low whistle*
nice, should be a song...
I like this poem, its mystic and cryptic and shrouded in mystery.
great writing, dear warrior of the pen.
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YAAAAAAAAAAY
Thanks for such a kind comment.
Mystery is my second name.
This was a fine attempt for one a shrouded poem.
RD.
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Sonnett?
Yes with perfect meter and rhyme.
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