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Comes

Comes
Loves together
Better than ever

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • cherche -d -ame
    March 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    thank you for entering into this contest. May I ask if you purposelly put the lines this way? I believe it would read better as:
    Love
    comes together
    better than ever
    I stumbled a bit reading it the other way. Thanks again and best wishes in the contest.
    reenie

    • poet43
      March 13, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      Thanks

      I did go the way I wrote it . . . as . . .


      Comes (mispelled)
      Loves together (two people together)
      Better than ever (they've done this before, but this one was special)

      I do appreciate your re-design of the lines. I was on the more erotic side of the coin, you were on the wonderful love side. Room for both I assume.

      Again, thanks for feedback. Will be watching for the results of the contest. Neat form, I've never been there.

      poet


      • cherche -d -ame
        March 14, 2007
        Edit | Reply
        thanks for explainingyes , there is room for both versions indeed , and yours does work
        reenie