Together as one,
Engaged in a kiss,
Closing our eyes,
In deliberate bliss.
Joining our shadows,
From moonlight above,
Beneath all the stars,
Just me and my love.
Her arms hold me tight,
As I play with her hair,
Ebony, with curls,
Both luscious and fair.
We open our eyes,
When lips move apart,
To look at the love,
We know won't depart.
Within us has grown,
This something so strong,
That to you and forever,
My heart will belong.
When moonlight has left,
And daytime is long,
I know that between us,
Our love will go on.
A contest entry
- Romance.. (guys only) by Angelflower.
1340 points, ended May 27, 2008, 34 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rhyme and Flow part 5 Love, romance or sensual - 50,000 points series by cricketjeff.
4000 points, ended July 16, 2008, 55 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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A very sweet love poem, ends on a slant but otherwise well rhymed very nice meter.
Thanks for the entry and please keep coming back in the later rounds
Jeff and Sue
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Oh this was just so beautiful!!
It was sweet and so very loving.. I really liked this..
You created yet another great write with a very vivid image! I really liked this and enjoyed reading it very much... Well done!! best of luck..
Angel
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Beautifully done!!!
Sweet, tender & moving...
Great rhyme, rhythm & flow...
Well penned, well said, well done!!!
A great write you have here...
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whaw!!!
If a guy read this to me I would be putty in his hands!!!
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This is very sweet. I hope that my secret love will one day feel that way about me.
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aww, this really is very sensual and so sweet.
you're quite a romantic by heart. 
i can feel this is a special tribute.
as a poem, it flows very well, and captures the intense moment very softly... like the winds are revolving round the two lovers, caressing their best emotions. i really like these lines:
"Joining our shadows,
From moonlight above,"
hoping the moonlight works miracles with the shooting stars.
bless ya loads!!
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nice poem
I do though the beat was a bit off the line "Ebony, with curls", but apart from that: GREAT
"In deliberate bliss.
Joining our shadows,
From moonlight above,
Beneath all the stars"
I love this part
Your Yara must be a very happy woman ...
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A nice description of your Yara you have told, I enjoyed reading it and it is obviously very sentemental to you, thanks for sharing it with us nut cases, I hope you and your love do last forever...
P.S Giant Monkeys once opened a store, unfortunatlly for the human public there was not much call for nit grooming and this new business never took off. -
Love
I love poetry that has to do with love. I base most of my poems off love, because there is so much to say about it. In this case, you have a very positive piece occuring and you express that greatly. Good job -
Love it!
Awwwwwwwwwww. This is sweet. There is some lucky dark haired girl out there with a great guy that can say the right things. The wording just lifts you up, though the colors were a little hard to read...you can use blue...just lighten it up a tad. Thanks for sharing. Love and Peace, Charlene. -
I really like this it was beautiful and i would show it to your Darling Yara. I think she would love it. It had that certain ring to it that it made it sound like music when i read it it was just so sweet and so gentel.. Great work, keep it up
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Beautiful
That's all I have to say because is all it is. Beautiful, gorgeous. You have a talent. Good job in expressing your feelings. Keep up the wonderful work,
love always
~musicangel -
Amazingly well written, it shows your complete love for her and she is the only one.
"Joining our shadows, From moonlight above, Beneath all the stars, Just me and my love."
That right there could be a piece in itself.
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Gorgeous
How romantic - I could almost feel the hands on my own ebony curls! A lovely poem - thank you
Stephanie x
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lips bloom like tulips
the nectar drops of love streaming with full to the brim situation appear to me like lips opening up like blooming tulips
the verse is like the essence of ecstasy the love enjoys in the cream of lips -
I'm not sure what I saw before but the only one I see now is in the last line of the second stanza wont needs a '
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Perfect
You speak of a love that is true and sealed with a kiss. Very well done. Thanks
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Very touching and beautiful! You did an amazing job expressing yourself and rhyming. Very nice other than a few grammer mistakes.
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This is quite beautiful, soft, and very loving. You've expressed your emotion so well and have drawn a tender picture of the two of you together, forever. Well done and a wonderful dedication to your love! Best to you, Elizabeth
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!greatjob!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this has awsome fluidity to it!!! Overall, i really enjoyed reading this fantastic romantic poem you have so well penned for us!!!! Your alliteration and meter and rhyme are so right on the mark, that your thoughts completel;y blow me away!!!!
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oh my goodness
This one of the most beautiful poems I have ever heard.
I just love the wording of it so much i couldn't describe how it made me feel to read it! keep up the good work because its not that easy to come across guys who can write things like this.
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Bravo!
I love the word choices in this one. It sets the emotional tone and rhythm perfectly. Great imagery you have painted also. The type that changes depending upon the reader's personal experience. Great Write! ~Peace~Gary -
Within us has grown,
This something so strong,
That to you and forever,
This is the most universal phenomenon of this great nature which is the essence of this verse bringing a
kind of the truth of the heart with its great pleasure in intself as well...Great words and great poetry is here...The verse here is a true picturisation of the heart who have lost its love and its hope as well
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STUNNING!!!!!!!!!!
STUNNING WRITING. AMAZING FLOW. WONDERFUL SENTIMENTS HERE. BRILLIANT. I REALLY ENJOYED READING THIS. I LOVE THE LAYOUT OF YOUR PIECE AS WELL. KEEP WRITING. THIS WAS OUTSTANDING WORK.
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"Within us has grown,
This something so strong,
That to you and forever,
My heart will belong"
What a beautiful tribute to the one you love, this is sweet and tender and romantic.
I love the imagery you have portrayed here.
great job on this one.
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