Haunted,
silent breath on window pane
patter fluctuating thoughts
in slow rhythmic depression
If you were younger,
and empty games still pleased you
you would blow harder,
‘til a silver mist shrouded
the scary outside world,
With trembling finger,
paint a picture,
of whatever passed your mind,
and softly smile
But now, you sit in silence
darkness slowly filling
empty thoughts
with empty dreams,
Dreams that blew away
through vacant skies
so long ago,
Still stare on, cold distant eyes.
Once upon a time you gave your life away
Once upon a time, you grew up
Author notes
huzzah
picture inspired
A contest entry
- It's all about the mystery, life is! by S2ndQueen.
450 points, ended April 20, 2007, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Sad poem and B. Mole (me) will put you onto his favourites lists for this one - best wishes and keep on posting good sad romantic poems!
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Bravo
This is ringing in truth. How as we get older we tend to loss the innocence to see beond our own face. Well said. I loved it.
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Powerful
This is a very powerful, thought provoking piece. Your last two lines are spectacular! I love the way you lead the reader through the subject's life and made us a part of those experiences. Beautiful. I could feel the loss.
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Wow-
This gives many images-Powerful
What a Journey You take the reader on
Dreams can deliver many messages~
give much insight!
Thank You for sharing this with us
Best wishes to You in the contest
Many blessings too
and much love~ Desire~*~
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SO BEAUTIFUL!
Your words paint a picture so true of what one may be thinking as they stop and ponder their life. Great write
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Splendid!!
Thisone really captured me...giving so much emotions you get so now and then if you think your life over..
Wonderful done..
Your ending is perfect:
Once upon a time you gave your life away
Once upon a time, you grew up
Good luck in this contest,
XXJeannette
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